Best Laid Plans
by cherry619
Summary: It seems as if John can't plan anything right. If this new hunt doesn't kill him that's ok Dean has that covered. Limp Sam/Protective Dean/Very bad judgement John
1. Chapter 1

**Authors: **Ok this is a new story as this idea has been bugging me for god knows how long. I know I have another story out but I needed to get this out of my system because this one is all planned and ready to be written. This chapter might not make a whole lot of sense but it will come later chapters as it give's insightful information. If you don't like guilty bad planning John this definitely isn't the story for you. But if you do like limp Sam and really pissed off protective dean I guarantee you're in for a treat. The boy's ages clock in at Sam-17 and Dean-21. Other than that I hope you enjoy. Thanx Charity

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**_The best laid schemes of mice and men, __Go often askew, __And leave us nothing but grief and pain, __For promised Joy! _**_**"To A Mouse" By Robert Burns**_

Why do all my recent plans just seem to come crumbling down right before my eyes? Or why does it seem like the more I start thinking about a new plan the harder the consequences hit me? _Gosh my head hurts. _But hey that's what thinking too much will do.

John sighed as he stared over at his sons. His most recent plan-_which he thought was good- _came back to literally bite him in the ass. It left him with one son wanting to rip him a new one and another lying in a bed looking like death warmed over with about 60 stitches in him. Oh God how'd did it even get this far? How did I let this happen?

He can't even begin to think of all the wrong exits and turns he's taken in life but right now this one clocks in pretty high. Next time when Dean tells him he doesn't like an idea he's going to listen to him no doubt about it.

* * *

"_Dean, have you researched those werewolf attacks yet?" John asked with a bit of annoyance in his voice. _

"_No, besides that's Sammy's job. Right Samantha?" Dean said sarcastically winking at his younger brother. _

"_Sure leave it all to me. Might as well let me clean the guns too and drive the car and…" Sam didn't get a chance to finish as a pillow hit his head muffling his response. _

"_Boys!" John yelled. He really wasn't in the mood for this. "Sam just go to the library and see what you can find." He said with an aggravated huff. He was just using this as an excuse to talk to his eldest alone. _

"_But Dad." Sam whined. _

"_No 'buts'. Go!" He yelled pointing to door. John turned knowing that his youngest obliged to his orders. _

"_Alright Dad what's up?" Dead asked as he turned to his fathers stressed features. "You were in a semi-descent mood. Why the mood swings? Are you pm-sing?" Dean snickered at the last remark but shut up as his fathers head swung up to give him a stern glare. _

_John sighed as he lowered himself into a motel chair. He'd been dreading this moment since day one and he hated that he went behind his sons back to get this in the works but it had to be done. The hunt needed more hands and he was the only person who was trained for this other than himself and his sons. Plus he still semi-trusted the kid. I mean clocking Sammy in the face isn't excusable but his reasons were a little understandable coming from a hunter's perspective. The kid thought Sam was lazy and lacked necessary hunting skill to do this kind of work. Some time's he actually agrees with him but still punching his son in the face wasn't the way to get a point across especially when Dean found out. _

_John looked into his sons green eyes and began. "Well you know that this werewolf is really no laughing matter." John said shakily as he scratched absently at his neck. "I kinda needed extra hands for the hunt." _

"_So why so stressed? If you needed an extra hand why the hell worry so much?" Dean asked confused. He knew deep down there was more to the story and his father was holding things out from him. It kinda pissed him off knowing that his Dad went back to keeping things on a 'need to know' basis. He really thought that they were past that but you can't really stop old tricks. _

"_Uh…I asked someone who you might not like." Was it hot in here? It felt like he was being put on a spotlight; forced to tell all his secrets. Why was this so hard? Oh yeah because the hunter you asked to help had punched Sam in the face last time you initially saw him. Maybe that was why. _

"_Well tell me." Dean's patience was wearing thin. Dean didn't have much patience and he thinks that whoever came up with 'patience is a virtue' was on crack. _

"_I asked Devin to come." John cringed as he even said it the name bringing up many arguments on his and Dean's part. _

"_Devin as in McAdams Devin right? He had to be sure he was hearing his Dad right. This couldn't be the guy his Dad was talking about his Dad hadn't lost all his marbles. _

"_Yeah son I need him on this hunt and I already called him he said he'll do it." He saw red creeping up Dean's face and he knew he was in for it big time but his son should learn when he makes a plan it will go smoothly. _

_Dean's breathing picked up as he tried to control the rage he was feeling. He never EVER directs this anger towards his father but when his fathers being a complete dumbass it was time for some intervention. "What!? Are you nuts?" He really like to know those answers cause as it seems his Dad seemed to being going a little off his rocker lately. Carefully and meticulously planning non stop and if one plan should fail he would totally go berserk. _

"_Dean we need him on this hunt. What happened in the past is in the past we need to set it aside." He pleaded as Dean rose out of his sit. He wouldn't let his 21 year old son over power him in this conversation. He was in control. _

"_I don't care how bad we need him that man is a fucking lunatic. Do you not remember what happened the last time we saw him?" He was only seeing red. His father was doing it again putting the hunt before his own sons. If he did it to him he wouldn't care less but this was Sammy. Sammy who was carefree, stubborn, and also naïve. The little fucker may have gotten to put his hands on Sam last time but he wasn't letting a repeat performance happen. _

"_Yeah I remember. I remember you beating the shit out of him so I really think he's learned his lesson." John's head was flooded with memories of that specific day. He and Dean went out of the room only for a second and when they came back he found Sam lying on the ground nursing a split lip and Devin standing over him triumphantly. He was shocked beyond belief but the rage and protectiveness in Dean couldn't be contained as he gave that kid hell. The kid was a mass of bruises and welts when Dean was done. _

"_I don't care if he got it or not. I don't like this idea Dad." _

_Dean's voice broke him out of thought as he looked into Dean's eyes. While still angry there was a thin veil of trust still in his depths. "I promise nothing will happen. You got to trust me." _

_He wanted to trust his Dad-with everything in him-he completely did. There was the nagging voice in his head saying this was a bad idea. "Alright but I don't have to like it." Dean said dejectedly as he stopped his rapid angered pacing. _

"_Good now lets go get your brother shall we." John smiled as he went over to his oldest and gave his shoulder a firm squeeze. Nothing could go wrong. _

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**So are you completely confused? If you are its normal but this was just a flashback from John so that explains that. More scenes from the real world in the next chapter. Plus Devin McAdams is solely my own and It took a long time to figure out a damn name for him sheesh who knew. So should I continue? Thanx Charity**


	2. Chapter 2

**Authors Note: **Sorry about the whole centered not centered thing. Ugh…I had such a hard time with it and it totally kept un centering my thing and I'm like screw it just keep it that way. Well I guess has a vengeance cause it centered only a portion of the story. I guess that was the middle finger to me lol. Anyway this chapter will clear a lot of things up that the other may have confused you on. Thanx Charity

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Ha everything would be fine now that has to be the must ironic fucking thing he's ever said. John shakes his head at the distant memory as he digs deeper into their next hunt. In his total time of panic and desperation he had to escape somehow and hunting was the only way he knew how.

He glanced briefly up at his two sons watching them with fatherly concern. No matter what Dean says or thinks he was concerned about his youngest. I mean hell it was his damn fault he ended up with about 60 stitches in him. John admittedly broke eye contact when Dean's seething gaze came piercing up at his own.

He heard almost a muted growl and Dean then laid a protective hand across his sleeping sibling's chest. Almost as if to say _mine. _

Don't worry Dean; daddy isn't taking Sammy away not after the stunt he pulled. John thought to himself as he looked back over to his long time friend Bobby singer. He was in a mass of panic and chaos and when he called for help Bobby knew exactly what he meant…find me a hunt.

He didn't actually think Bobby would come up here to see him and offer to go with him on the hunt but he needed all the help he could get. The thing Bobby had dug up was a vour it feasted on fear and ate the flesh of the living. It was totally going off pattern though and hunting during the day instead of at night and it had John baffled. He was soon coming to the utter realization he needed more hands then four.

_Hmmm did that plan work out good last time John? _I think not.

"John you ok over there?" A quiet voice whispered through his reservoir.

"Yeah," John said with a sigh. "I'm fine." Oh boy he sure as hell wasn't. He had to come up with another plan to get extra hands for this hunt. How fun.

"Don't lie to me; I know this is eating you up." Bobby singer said quietly as he sat adjacent from his hunting friend.

It was only five days ago that the frantic Winchester was screaming through the phone about the current events. Bobby really couldn't believe his ears at what John was describing. But boy when he stepped into this motel room and felt the hostility and tension he knew without a doubt John screwed up big time.

Not to mention John's youngest been a little worse for wear if you consider having your side sliced wide open by a werewolf _a little worse for wear._

"I'm not lying. Can we just focus on this new hunt please?" John pleaded with his friend to shut up and drop it. If anyone knew John then they know when it comes to sharing his feelings he's not up for par.

"Alright what ya got." Bobby sighed giving up the fight. John was using the hunt as a distraction and he knew it.

"This vour seems pretty nasty Bobby and the death count is rising." John pressed on.

"Ok then we go in and kill it."

"I mean we kind of need a few extra hands don't cha think?" John asked with a hint of innocence.

Both of Bobby's eyebrows shot up at that statement. Wasn't that how they got into this mess in the first place?

John noticing Bobby's quick assumptions and accusations went on. "Don't worry I have a different plan but all the same I hate it even more than my first so called _brilliant_ plan."

"John just lay it on me." Bobby grumbled out. He could tell that this hair brained scheme wasn't going to be any better than the last one.

"Uh…I decided to take Dean with us and," John's voice went down into a real low whisper. "I decided to get Devin to watch Sam while were away."

Both of Bobby's eyebrows almost shot off his forehead at that. Was John out of his mind? Wasn't that the kid who initially got Sam in this situation? "John I really need to swerve your decision…" Bobby started but stopped as John's hand came up.

"Listen I know this sounds absolutely terrible but I see no other options. Sam can't travel, we need help and Devin doesn't have a clue about these damn things or I take him. He's useless on this hunt." John didn't even like the options as he said them out loud. He's sure other people are probably gonna start considering about a loony bin soon.

"I understand your concerns but come on can't we just handle this ourselves and leave Dean with Sam?" Bobby asked incredulously. Maybe John got knocked in the head on that last hunt.

"I just don't know what too do," John finally sighed as a weeks worth of stress and tension came oozing out. "I'm sure there's a smarter way to approach this but this it's the only way I see fit so far."

Damn stubborn ass Winchesters. Bobby shook his head sadly. There was no arguing with John once his head latched onto a concept he wasn't letting it go. "Alright John but I don't think Dean will like it too much." Bobby said as he gave a glance at the oldest Winchester. He was currently sitting in a chair pushed so close to the bed Sam was laying in you would think he was sitting Indian style. Quiet words of comfort and reassurances could be heard in the still room. Not much else could be seen as Dean's looming presence completely engulfed the youngest Winchester so no other eyes could see him.

"He'll just have to deal. I'm sure that Dean will give Devin a stern talking too before we leave." God knows he already did. He yelled, screamed, demanded answers but the cocky sonofabitch just feigned innocence. If anyone could break through the kid's cocky exterior it was a protective and enraged older brother that goes by the name of Dean.

"Alright I'll research this hunt some more I know you have to go get his consent." Bobby said with a little dread. He would be left alone with Dean's wraith. It wasn't the first time that John left and when he did Dean ranted and raved to him about his father making the biggest mistake of his life. He agrees with the kid but he really didn't want to sit through an hour of Jerry Springer.

"Yeah." John said quietly while grabbing his coat. He needed to go to Devin's house and ask the favor. It seemed rather odd that Devin lived in the town of Boise, Idaho but he always said never pass up an opportunity or babysitter in this matter.

"Where are you going?" A lone and angry voice shot out. Dean was beyond pissed no Dean was seething with rage until all he could see was read. _"I promise nothing will happen. You got to trust me." _His Dad's words rang in his head like a song you can't get rid of. He couldn't shake them out. He trusted his Dad and look where it landed him or rather Sammy. It landed Sam with his side split open and 54 stitches to close it shut. Believe me he knows he's the one that did them.

"Out, I'll be back." John quipped as he was about to open the door. He heard the muted 'good' even though Dean didn't intend for it. John gave a sad smile and shut the door with a soft pull.

"Dean can you at least give your father some sympathy here?" Bobby asked as he saw the broken look on John's face. Though he has to be on Dean's side John did screw up big time but he really didn't know that would happen. Humans make mistakes. Well if you're John Winchester you make catastrophic mistakes.

"Sympathy? You want me to give him some sympathy?" Dean's voice rose as he spoke. "Dad made a mistake there's no way around it." Dean said disgustingly. He followed his father blindly and gave him his undivided trust even though his gut instinct was to jump ship and run. His Dad once again only thought about the hunt and he deserves the consequences.

"I agree boy, it's just his head's a little confused right now you got to give him time to think." Bobby offered sadly. There was no way to turn this argument around. John would have to fix this himself. _Somehow._

"Yeah his head's screwed up alright." Dean snorted weakly. He stopped the petty argument realizing it was going no where and looked down at his younger sibling again. He was still afraid that Sam's wound would get infected with the way Sam was looking like death warmed over. His face was pale, his breath was coming out in little pants and he still had a significant amount of blood loss. If it wasn't for the God known as Bobby, Dean feared Sam wouldn't have made it through the night. When Bobby arrived he brought with him an I.V and the Universal donor mixed together that means good new for Sam. Cause God knows there Dad sure didn't think of it when he decided to do impromptu surgery at this run down motel.

Dean smiled sadly as he lifted up the corner edge of the cover peeling away the bandage to get a good look at the neat row of stitches. Sam was silent throughout his ministrations which worried him even more. It's been at least five days and he expected Sam to be waking up by then but he lay blissfully between unconsciousness and sleep.

"How's those stitches holding?" Bobby asked sincerely.

"What? Oh fine, it's just…" Dean bit his lip at the last statement not wanting to arouse any warnings of fears but he was becoming suspicious himself.

"What?" Bobby asked worriedly.

"I think Sam might be getting an infection." Dean said sadly. Even though the stitches were unscathed Sam should be awake by now and his color should have at least returned with the blood transfusions. He should be getting better not worse.

"Are you sure?" Bobby asked as he strode over to the bed to inspect the wound himself.

"Yeah," Dean said while scrubbing a hand over his face. "I mean damn it Bobby he needs a hospital not this filth infested dump."

"I know, I know." Bobby said putting a hand up inspecting the wound close up. He only saw it once from a distance and now looking at it this close seriously disturbed him. No kid that young should have 54 stitches sewn in him by hand at that. "If he get's any worse I'll take him myself John Winchester be damned." Now that was the truth. John may have the best intentions at heart but sometimes his brain get's priorities mixed up.

"No if it get's that bad I'm taking Sam and were hightailing our asses out of here."

Bobby looked over in shock at Dean's statement. He looked to see if there was any sarcasm but there was only seriousness. _You better pray your youngest gets through this John or you'll lose both your sons. _

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**So is this more easy to understand? If not you'll get John's side of the argument next Chapter. If you think John's a little loony you have to remember that when John's scared or frightend he tends to get knee deep in a hunt to push away those fears and usually a hutn for John is all out. Sometimes John's priorities do get mixed up and someone has to give him a good swift kick in the butt to realize it. So I hope you understand this one more. Feedback would be appreciated. Thanx Charity**


	3. Chapter 3

**Authors Note:** I know some people are still confused but I'm slowly unveiling things as I go along each chapter coming together as almost a puzzle piece. You have to have patience with this one. I hope you'll stick with the whole mysterious vibe and hang on I promise things will all be unraveled when it's there time. And please remember my number one saying _not all is as it seems_. You remember that your reading experience will be an enjoyable one I guarantee it also if you like limp Sam you'll enjoy this too lol. Thanx Charity.

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John walked the lonely streets of Boise, Idaho trying to clear his thoughts of all past events. It was really funny how things just seem to fall into place. He needed an extra hand on the hunt, walla there was Dean, he needed a babysitter for Sammy, and walla there was Devin. Though Devin was the one that initially caused this he was in desperate times and he was sure after the stern talking he gave him after that night the kid wouldn't try anything stupid. Would he?

When did it all go wrong anyhow? Devin hunted with him plenty of times, joked around with Dean numerous of times but in all the times he could remember he can't really recall him and Sammy hanging out or what not. _Maybe that was your first clue John. _

A feint memory comes to mind as he recalls the numerous conversations that should have set off alarm bells in his head.

* * *

_John was busy trying to get together enough information on this new hunt an old time friend Devin McAdams graciously offered to help. Besides his son Dean loved when someone near his age came to help for a change. Your 15 year old brother brooding in the backseat isn't the greatest person for adult time. His older son is maturing as a man and needs an older influence and not one like himself that can wake the dead with his looks sometimes. _

_Devin McAdams is 23 years old thin yet muscular and has short red hair. Almost as if his head were on fire, that's what Dean say's all the time anyway. His height towers over Dean himself and he's a formidable ally when it comes to hunting. _

_John looked over briefly at Devin and Sam chatting quietly in the corner. Hmm that looks suspicious. Sam's either brooding or doing homework. Besides Sam has told me on numerous occasions that he doesn't like Devin. No matter. _

_

* * *

_

Thinking back to it he remembers muffled _"You'll never amount to anything." _or _"You're the most pathetic excuse for a hunter I've ever seen." _Devin always was a goes by the book kinda guy. He followed every ones order and criticized every move including my own once or twice. It seemed as the more he showed up to hunt the more he acted like me. Becoming a drill sergeant and perfectly pointing out the 'wrong' move and the 'right' move. John's just surprised Dean's ego allowed that from him. He surmised that Dean saw Devin as a father figure and a compadre. _But Sam now that's a different story. _Now while he agrees with Devin on some points it just seems like Devin wanted to train Sam to be a hunter like himself. Pushing him, making fun of him, and taunting him, even going so far as to hit him. That was the bottom line for Dean and me but it was Dean in the end who told him to get his ass out and never come back. _But oh my big mouth had to invite him back. _

_

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_

_John drove the Impala with Dean in the front seat to go pick up Sam at the library. On the way he swung by Boise which wasn't far from Idaho city which is where there current hunt is. He looked at the tension between Devin and Dean. Though Devin was smiling and eagerly talking about the hunt Dean had taken on the tricks of his younger brother and started to huff out of annoyance. John Winchester was not one for brooding. _

_Pulling up to the curb off the library he shut off the car and looked at Dean. "Dean go get your brother." He said sternly. He wanted to act like a child he would be treated like a child. He wouldn't be embarrassed in front of other hunters. _

_With out even saying anything Dean slammed the door and strutted up to the library. _

"_So that went well." Devin breathed with a smile. _

_John gave him a smile back. "He's still sore about last time let him come around." _

"_So Johnny we huntin a werewolf huh?" Devin said playfully eyeing the library all the while. _

"_Yeah been a while hasn't it," Jon sighed he had to get this out. "Listen Devin this isn't really me more than it is Dean. Last time you were here you…" John stopped mid sentence as Devin put his hand up. _

"_I know Johnny boy I hit Sammy in the face. I'm sorry I was totally irresponsible but you need to teach that son better I'm only looking out for Sam's safety and he'll never make it in this business being soft." Devin said sincerely. _

_John was starting to get angry but Devin's words rang true. Sam wasn't really a hunter at heart. He would wind up getting hurt if he didn't crackdown and teach him. His methods seem to be wearying thin with Sam and it seems as if Devin might be his answer. _

"_I know just don't let it happen again or Dean will kick your ass." John didn't even question that. He was so proud of his oldest and the man he become. _

"_Believe me Johnny I know I can still feel my broken nose every time I sneeze." Devin laughed with a hint a fear. _

_

* * *

_

Good times? John thought aloud. He was right at Devin's door step and he really didn't know how the young hunter would react. Would Devin go full karate and try to kick my ass? Or would he run and hide? I'm expecting the latter. Being in the hunting business doesn't warrant a paycheck every week and you could sure tell by Devin's run down apartment. Though it's better than living on the streets it was still a little worse for wear.

He stepped up onto the steps and knocked lightly on the door.

The door swung open a millimeter and a face that needed definite shaving showed. "Devin that you?" John asked incredulously. From all the times he'd known the boy he hasn't seen the boy so disheveled. His normal red hair was a muted brown, his clean shaven face was taking on a red beard and he still wore the clothes from the hunt! That was five days ago. Disgusting.

"John?" Devin asked with bewilderment as he opened the top lock on the door and opened the door all the way. "What are you doing here?"

"I should be here to kick your ass," he said forcefully but muted his tone as he saw Devin cringe. It seems as if the kid is doing that job already to himself. "Listen I know what happened to Sam you must be sorry about. Hell I'm sorry I let it happen." He shook his head in sadness.

"I am Johnny I wouldn't have done that unless I thought Sam could handle it but I didn't realize the kid would trip over his own two feet." Devin said while chuckling. "The kid's taller than me now."

"Yeah," John said smiling thinking back to his Sammy. "But that still doesn't warrant a full apology but I need a favor a real big one."

"Listen Johnny if it's a hunt I don't think-"

"No, not a hunt but um…you know that stupid stunt you pulled warranted 54 stitches in Sam's side." John said with a flinch even now he can picture his Sam lying still on the ground with blood leaking out of his side in huge spurts.

"Yeah I kinda was there John well not for his patch up anyway." Devin said scratching his head. "Where's this going?"

"I'm going on a hunt and I needed a few extra hands, so I'm taking Dean." John didn't even want to finish the thought.

"But-"

"But Sam can't travel and I need someone to watch him till we get back." He watched as all the color drained from Devin's face. "Please it will only be for a week's tops."

"Does Dean know?" Devin asked.

"No not yet but he'll go along. Just don't screw this up and don't do anything to Sam." He said sternly. "Next time it won't be your nose broken it'll be your neck." John said coldly with an evil glean in his eye thriving on how Devin squirmed under his stare.

"I un…derstand Johnny Boy. I got it." Devin gulped as he began to step inside.

"I'll call you when to come. Of course that broken neck is just from me that's not even describing what Dean will do." God only knows what Dean would do to them both. He swallowed convulsing at the thought.

"I understand. I'll see ya then." Devin said with a smile and closed the door.

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**So another bit of info is revealed but I wanted to put more but it was way too long so I split it into two chapters. Next chapter: You find out what happened on that fateful night and what exactly Devin did. Plus you get to see John and Dean's confrontation on his other brilliant plan. Stay tuned. Feedback is appreciated. Thanx Charity**


	4. Chapter 4

**Authors Note: **First and foremost I would like to apologize for my lateness of updating I know that some of you know I update a lot faster but life has just gotten too crazy for my fast updates so they might come a little slower then they use to. But I'll try to update as quickly as I can I promise. Another very important note I am very gracious for all the reviews I get for any story I write and everyone knows that I respond back to all reviews unless there anonymous. But there's a certain anonymous reviewer that has reviewed for other stories of mine that I want to send a special message to. This is the name she uses: cristina_armoa at hotmail dot com. Sweetheart I love that you're reviewing but I just can't read Spanish and I would love to hear what you say. I don't know how you read my stories unless you can speak English cause if you can I would love a review in English because not being able to decipher what you say breaks my heart. Thanx Charity.

* * *

The air was getting frigid as night fell upon Boise. John pulled his coat up tighter somewhat confident in his decision making. He knows he's not the world's greatest dad or even legitimately a good father but he's did the best he could. Both his boys know that. Trying to juggle what's best for the hunt and what's best for his sons can get stressful. Knowing that the people on the hunt depend on you and also knowing you have two sons at home that depend on your every action is one hell of a responsibility that he wishes he could handle better. He could strategize with the best of them; he could come up with all the possibilities and outcomes. Hell, he even could try to prioritize to one responsibility but it never works out. _Well at least the way he intended. _It seems as if every plan he's come up with lately has backfired in his face and he's really hoping this one doesn't. His role as a father is depending on this plan.

Next job was to just get Dean to agree to come. _Yeah, like that will be easy. _John snorted weakly to himself.

* * *

Bobby was getting tired. His eyes were dropping and his head was hurting. That damn John Winchester better get back here soon before he pushes Dean aside and kicks John's ass for him. He knows how each of the Winchester men work. He knows how each of them think. It really is amazing to watch that each one is so different yet so alike in so many ways. That's what ya do when you're stuck in a motel room with three stubborn ass Winchesters. You sit down drink a beer and just watch the show.

_If only he had a beer. _His heart hurts so.

Bobby knows how John's mind works. His mind is separated into two clear categories. Hunting and his boys. While the categories do tend to stay clear of each other they mix every now an again. Bobby is just afraid this is one of those circumstances where the categories are mingled and John doesn't have a clue what's right and wrong for the separate categories.

Bobby knows how Dean's mind works. Hell, sitting here watching him tend to his brother is easy to see whose number one on his priorities list. He knew that from the very beginning. Unlike John's mind, Dean's categories aren't two separate ones that are equal in size. No, Dean's main category is his brother and his father. Then hunting comes next in size. The rest are pleasure categories not even Bobby want's to mention.

Bobby even knows how Sam's mind works. Hell the damn size of the kid's brain is impressive enough. Sam's mind has a category labeled family that he truly and dearly cherishes. Bobby knows that even when John doesn't. Unlike his brother and fathers hunting doesn't have as big a category as the rest of the Winchester clan. No, Bobby knows that school trumps over hunting. Sam even has a special category for dreams and wishes. Other than his brother the kid came to him a few times to ask about _what ifs_.

It was like the whole family was an open book waiting to be read. No matter how hard they tried to hide their emotions or feelings. Bobby knows oh boy does he know. Yet sometimes he wishes he didn't know at all.

* * *

Getting almost to the motel John takes a moment to breathe in the cool air. He remembers doing this when Dean ushered a bleeding Sam in the room. That night was filled with complete panic and chaos even he couldn't handle.

_The forest was eerily silent for Johns liking and he thanked that he had an extra hand on the hunt. As he looked behind his shoulder at his two sons mixed emotions rang through him. His oldest had a look of pure determination on his face sheltering Sammy behind him. He could tell Dean was fully in hunting mode no matter the fact that he was brooding earlier. He smiled proudly. _

_Sam was another case. Though he too held his piece steadily in front of him he noticed the look on his face. An all too familiar one he was coming to hate. Sam was daydreaming. His son was daydreaming while they were on a very serious hunt. Damnit Sammy. _

_John stopped his stealthy walking and turned abruptly around getting an eyebrow raise from Devin and Dean. No he wasn't going to have Sam screw up this hunt and have Devin spit in his face saying "I told you so"._

_John marched up to his two son's pushing Dean aside and unleashed holy hell. "Sammy!" He watched as Sam retracted from lala land to meet his gaze._

"_Yes sir." Sam's voice trembled as he looked up at his father. _

"_What the hell do you think your doing?" John demanded angrily. Dean gave him a wayward glance to 'let it be' but he's been 'letting it be' for too long. Even Devin was smirking at the situation and he could only guess that Devin realized what Sam was doing. _

"_Uh…hunting." Sam said hesitantly. _

"_Hunting? Hunting!?" John yelled exasperated. "Try being stupid, try I don't know walking straight into danger." He hated even more when Sam was a smartass._

"_Dad." Dean said trying to calm his father down. This was so not the time for this argument. _

"_Stay out of this." He yelled to his oldest and was pleased that he backed off. "Sam you listen to me and you listen good. This daydreaming stuff has to stop or you're going to get yourself killed or one of us killed. Is that what you want? Do you want to be responsible for your family's death all because you were dreaming of something that's never going to happen?" His voice rose to a crescendo and he probably already alerted the werewolf to their presence. _

"_No…sir." Sam looked down shamefully as he hid his face with his long hair. _

"_Good now get your head in the hunt or I'm going to just start leaving you at home." He warned as he turned back around. This wasn't the time or place for this and he cursed that his younger son was making him lose his cool already. _

_He could hear muttered whispering from the back of him and he figured Dean was mending Sam's broken heart. Another tough egg to crack. When he lays an order Dean doesn't need to go kiss away Sam's booboos. _

"_So Johnny do I need to say it?" Devin whispered in his ear with his cocky grin in place. _

"_Don't even start in." John sighed as he could feel a tension headache begin. God this hunt was so turning into a bad one fast. _

"_Johnny like I told you all he needs is a push and I can do that for you."_

"_Like that went so well the last time." John said with a chuckle. Devin tried to somewhat 'train' Sam but that ended with Sam with a busted lip and Devin with a broken nose._

"_I let my anger get the better of me I was young and stupid I know more now."_

_That is true. When you're young you do stupid things if Sam was any candidate not to mention the outlandish things Dean did. God the scare they went through when they thought Dean actually had a son. He grounded Dean for about a year. _

_His thoughts were broken when a figure broke from the trees. He looked over at Devin and shook his head for the 'go ahead'._

"_There it is boys!" He yelled to his sons as he watched Dean move out from behind him. _

_His first shot missed as did Devin's and Dean's. Sam never fired yet because he was only used unless they couldn't kill it. _

_Sam walked up to stand next to his brother as he readied to fire._

_John looked over and prayed Sam wouldn't screw it up. This damn one was a fast one. _

_Sensing that Devin moved from next to him he looked around to find out where he was. The werewolf was stalking them angered that they tried to kill it. So he wanted to know everyone's position. _

_He finally located Devin standing right behind Sam. His brows arched in confusion until he heard the whispered words. _

"_Go get it Sammy." _

_His eyes shot up in horror as Devin pushed his youngest out in front. Unfortunately for Sam his longs legs tangled and he couldn't catch his balance thus losing his weapon in the process._

"_Sammy!" He heard Dean yell but it was too late. The werewolf pounced at the approach. Before he had a chance to even shoot the damn thing he watched in sickening horror as the werewolf sliced straight through Sam's side. With a cry Sam went down. The werewolf went in for the kill but himself and Dean were much too quick as they aimed directly for the heart taking out the threat. _

_He stood in horror almost as if everything went in slow motion. This couldn't be happening. God don't let this be happening. _

_He soon turned his frightening horror into fury. He looked over at Devin who was too looking on in shock. He walked the two steps to him and started to rip him a new one._

"_What the hell were you thinking? I'm going to string you up with your own intestines and watch how you suffocate to death." He yelled as he towered over Devin's frame. Devin cringed and seemed to deflate upon hearing his threat. How could he do that? His friend? He just carelessly hurt his son._

"_I'm sorry Johnny. I thought he could handle it." Devin apologized as he took a step back._

"_You thought he could handle it? What the hell kinda cracked up excuse is that?" John blew out a breath as he ran a hand through his hair. Devin was just talking about trying to teach Sam the tricks of the trade and Devin goes by the books so it's no wonder he pushed him out to 'handle' the job. Of course he hadn't intended for the kid to trip over his feet or drop his weapon. Geez where the hell did he go wrong._

"_Listen you better get the hell outta here before I take this gun and blow your brains all over Idaho City." He said coldly. _

"_How am I suppose to get back I don't have a ride?" _

"_You better find a way or it's a hearse for you." He really didn't want to see this guys face right now. His evil thoughts were interrupted when a voice rang out._

"_Dad get your ass over here Sammy needs help!" _

_He broke his gaze from Devin as he ran over to where his oldest was crouched over Sam. The sight made him sick. Blood was everywhere no matter the fact that Dean took his top shirt off to stop the bleeding It just kept coming. Sam was so pale it was almost like he was…_

_He couldn't even finish the thought as his breakfast, lunch and dinner came creeping back up to visit him. He quickly bent over and vomited to the side. The sight was too much. He doesn't mean to be cocky but he's a tough son of a bitch with the rest of them but the sight of his baby boy bleeding out was too much. _

"_Damn it Dad!" John heard Dean curse him out as many more followed. He swiped his hand across his mouth as he too crouched down to take a look. _

"_He needs a hospital." Dean said fearfully while holding the shirt in place._

"_No!" I said quickly because they were in enough trouble with there insurance scams. He couldn't risk it if he or Dean got whisked off to jail to leave an injured Sam in the hospital all alone. They could take care of this themselves. _

"_What! Are you mad? He needs a hospital he's losing to much blood Dad." Dean said with a hint of anger._

"_Listen we can take of this we have all the supplies we need I can call Bobby and we'll be ok." I assured but the look on Dean's face said it all. He stopped trusting my word as soon as Sam got hurt. _

"_Whatever Dad but as soon as things start to get just a tad bit bad __**I'm**__ taking him to the hospital with or without you." Dean seethed as he began to scoop his brother into his arms._

"_Let me help." John said but Dean gave him a stare that said it all. He wasn't aloud to touch. So he did the only thing he could do he got out his cell phone and called Bobby Singer. _

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**Phew I didn't expect this to get that long either lol. So now I have to break it into a 3rd****. So dean and John's confrontation will come in the next chapter I promise lets hope that doesn't get so long either. So what do you think of what happened on the hunt? Feedback would be appreciated. Thanx Charity**


	5. Chapter 5

**Authors Note: **Sorry that Dean's and John's confrontation wasn't in the last chapter the chapter just slipped away from me and was longer than expected. It will definitely be in this chapter so expect language from both fronts. I really like everyone's views on John's character as I put him in a different characterization than most authors do. Don't worry though John's not doomed forever and he will FINALLY make the right choice in the course of this story but you have to hit rock bottom before you can go to the top. Same with how Dean views his dad in this story you can only go down before you go up. So expect a lot of tension and anger between the two for awhile. In addition, a lot have been asking for Sam's POV but don't fret his will be unveiled when the time is right he WILL be in this story and our Sammy has a lot on his mind believe me. Thanx for all the reviews so far they make me *squee* with joy. Thanx Charity.

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John opened the door hesitantly not really wanting to go inside and drop the bomb he knew he would be laying. He quickly took a deep breath and opened the door in a rush. Shutting the door behind him he was met with Bobby's aggravated face. He figured it was because he took longer then was necessary. _Sorry Bobby. _

John took off his coat as he laid it on the chair. He looked over at his youngest to see how he was doing but was a bit saddened that he couldn't even see him. Dean's body was completely covering him. He figured that after he left he pissed off Dean pretty good.

John sighed as he made his way over to the table Bobby currently hovered over. He sat down as he melted into the chair.

"Long time no see." Bobby said in an aggravated huff dropping the papers he was shuffling over.

"Yeah," John said smiling. "Sorry about that I just needed to clear my head."

"You coulda at least left me some beer or something." Bobby said with a smile. This job comes with a price.

"Hey now that don't come with the job." John joked but stopped as he looked over at Dean. He wasn't stupid Dean was listening in on everything he said.

"What is it?" Bobby asked with a frown. His eyes moved so he could see what John was watching and they met Dean's back. At first, he was puzzled but then it clicked. Dean was eavesdropping well he wouldn't call it that since Dean had a right to know. He would call it just joining in on the conversation.

"Just tell him John." Bobby whispered to his stoic friend. No need to piss Dean off anymore than he already is.

"Tell me what?" Dean's angry voice shot out.

_Well shit. _John thought as he sighed. He would have liked to approach this somewhat different but too late now. He gave Bobby a heated glare as he got up off the chair.

"Dean we need to talk." John said in a calm voice watching as Dean turned around in the chair he was sitting in. It was the first glimpse he got of his youngest in days. His baby boy was pale and a sheen of sweat was glistening on his brow. Though he couldn't see the stitches, he knew that it had to look bad. God knows he looked bad out in that forest on that night. It almost made him want to puke again.

"Well what is it? As you can see I have more important things I need to tend to." Dean said angrily as he watched his father stare absently at his wounded brother.

"I know Dean I know. It's just…" John gave a nervous chuckle as he scratched absently at his neck. How the hell was he going to approach this? In fact, there was no real easy way. Without laying another hefty, bomb on Dean. While John himself saw pretty clearly what happened that night he knew for a fact Dean didn't. John knew what Devin did Dean did not. He would like to keep it that way, as he didn't want to have one son arrested for first-degree murder. One son getting to play slice and dice with a werewolf is enough.

He would like to keep all the anger and Dean's fury on him if he is actually going to pull this off successfully.

"Just what? Damn it Dad I don't have time for this!" Dean yelled angrily as he watched his younger sibling move about in sleep obviously aggravated by the noise.

"Listen I know I'll let you get back as soon as were done but I have something very important to tell you, something you won't like." John's face fell a little as Dean's face took on a shade of red. He knew Dean wouldn't do anything drastic or anything rash with Sam still vulnerable as he was but still sometimes, his eldest's fury scared him a bit.

"Great what a perfect way to ruin another one of my days." Dean grumbled while folding his hands across his chest. "Might as well spit it out it's not like you can ruin me any worse than you already have." Dean said sadly looking at his baby brother.

John's heart ached at Dean's last statement and he just wanted to run away and never look back. Never have to make a fatherly decision again because it seems like he isn't much of one. He was about to just walk away but Bobby appeared next to him giving him a sad shake of the head. Even though it kills him to do this, he has too. It is his job to play double duty father and hunter. It is the only two roles he worked so hardly to maintain. He will admit that it seems a bit harebrained even to him but it is for both of their best interests. Sammy's and the hunt at hand.

"Listen we have a new hunt to do Dean." John quickly threw away his aching heart and replaced it with his more familiar cold one.

"So go do it." Dean said confused. Why was Dad telling him? He had Bobby and the Impala and all the knowledge and skill they needed. Why the hell bring it up to him?

"That's the thing _we_ are going to go do it me, Bobby and you." John cringed but tried to keep a hard face. He just couldn't stop as he backed up a step preparing for Dean to blow a head gasket. He was comforted when Bobby's hand settled on his shoulder.

"WHAT!?" Dean demanded angrily. He rose from his seated position to get right into his fathers face. His face was flushed red as he tried to interpret his father's words. _Was he actually hearing him right? _

"I'm sorry Dean there's no other way." John said sadly. His cold unforgiving face crumbled as he slumped his shoulders.

"No other way? Sam can't travel. Are you out of your mind!?" He waved his hands frantically in front of his fathers face, as he demanded answers. What the hell was he thinking? Sam's in no position to even get out of bed let alone travel.

John stopped to think abut what Dean said and a hint of confusion crossed his face. Oh, god he didn't get what I meant the first time. _Well double shit. _"No, no, no Dean you got it all wrong." John hurried to explain.

"Please explain then because it doesn't look like I like whatever comes out of your mouth anyway." Dean seethed almost enjoying the hurt look splash across his Dad's face. When did his Dad become so careless, sloppy, dare he say stupid? He has a pretty good idea when, when he started to hunt with that damn Devin kid. Though Devin had no doing in what happened he liked to say he was a bad luck charm to bring with them. Whenever that kid is around it seems like Sammy always get's hurt and John is just to damn blind to see it.

John winced at the venom in Dean's words but continued. "I know Sam can't travel so I kinda got someone to watch him so we can do this hunt." John blurted out.

"Are you on crack? I mean seriously what have you and Bobby been smoking?" Dean just looked on incredulously thinking Dad was trying to pull his strings or it was April fools and he just didn't know it. Because this was all turning into some sick, joke and he didn't like it, one bit.

"Hey now I ain't been smoking shit but drinking is fair game." Bobby defended but shut up as both Dean and John gave him heated glares.

"You know me I don't smoke." John reasoned.

"Do I Dad? Do I know you? Cause it seems like the more you keep talking the less it seems like I do." Dean said honestly. This past week hell month it seemed as if his Dad was becoming an entirely different person. A person Dean didn't even know didn't want to know.

John felt as if his heart totally shattered right then and there. That line would haunt him for the rest of his life. Dean knew how to deliver emotional and physical blows and right now he was wounded and almost on the verge of dying. If he ever wanted to get through with this he had to man up grow a set and stand up to his son. "That's enough!" He yelled startling not only himself but also Bobby and Dean. "I'm sick of your backtalk and I'm sick of your constant complaining of all my failures." He was a bit proud when Dean just looked on silent.

"I have a damn plan and were going through with it." He said with force.

"You listen here," Dean said as he jabbed a finger at his father's chest. "No one's watching Sam but me."

"No you listen here," John yelled towering over his sons frame. "You're going on that hunt and someone else is watching Sam." He said forcefully his voice booming through the room.

"I don't think so." Dean spat as he cringed back from his fathers towering frame.

"Fine you want to play it that way then I guess we have to take Sam with us." John said skillfully. He felt a pang in his heart as anger and fear flashed across Dean's face because he knew he was the one instilling it.

"Wh…what?" Dean stuttered out. Unsure if he was hearing correctly.

"You heard me. If no _one _but you is watching Sam then I guess we just have to take him with us." John said calmly. He really, really wanting to avoid using Sam as a ploy but damn it he knew Dean wouldn't go easily. Hell he trained him not to.

"You must me smoking crack." Dean whispered as he brushed his hand through his hair. Damn it his Dad! It's a damn lose lose situation. Sam can't travel and he isn't going to put him though that just so he can watch him that isn't fair to Sam. Hell none of this is. Dean sighed as he gave in. "Just who's going to be watching Sam?" He asked as he glanced over to his sleeping sibling.

"It's Devin." John said bluntly.

"What? You can't be serious?" Dean asked incuriously but faltered at his father's stone features. _Damn he is serious. _"Why the hell'd you get that guy? Why couldn't he go on the hunt?" He asked suspiciously.

"The thing were hunting he has no clue about he be useless and be a liability. I need you Dean." John said with still coldness in his voice but a hint pf pleading, begging. He could tell Dean was at his last limbs and was slowly but surely giving in.

Dean sighed. Sounded legit. He just didn't like it, or like how everything with that man just kept falling into place. It was to how can you say convenient. Every time that guys around Sam ends up hurt somehow.

"You in?"

A voice broke through his thinking as he looked up at his father's hopeful face. He gave one last glance at his wounded brother and gave a long sigh. "Yeah," Dean slumped his shoulders in defeat as he looked at the dirt carpet. "I'm in."

* * *

**So what do you think? Dean gave into his Dads orders but we all know that usually Dean's gut instinct rings true. What so you think of John keeping that secret from Dean? Is it going to dig him deeper in the hole? Anywho I want to add a mental note to this story as I came up with a very damn good brilliant idea that I'm not going to give away yet *giggles* but you'll like it when you see it. But it forces me to up the ages one year but that really has no phase on the story in any way shape or form so now I want you to see Dean as 21 and Sam as 18 believe me it will work out in your favor in the end. Devin stays the same. Feedback would be appreciated. Thanx Charity**


	6. Chapter 6

**Authors Note: **Phew John is cracking down and seeming pretty confident with this new plan or is he? Mwahaha. Many questions arose on Dean just giving in but that is all he knows how to do. He has listened to John all his life and he trusts him to know what is right and what is wrong. He doesn't know what Devin did and he doesn't assume anything could go wrong. With that being said let us keep and open mind. Plus Sam's POV is coming really, really, really, soon dare I say next chapter? More like dare I hope lol. Anyway, hope you like this chappy. Also we'll get to see a bit of Devin's POV soon. Dare I say next chapter lol. Thanx Charity.

***Oh yeah If you didn't read the mental note on the last chapter I had to up the ages one year for reasons in later chapters. Because stupid me forgot about it when thinking about this long forgotten story but don't worry it is going to work out for the better. So Dean's 21 and Sam's 18. Devin stays the same 26***

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John wasn't liking Dean's new attitude.

After John told Dean of the new hunt, he lost of all his anger, fury, even cockiness and started to sulk. He has been sitting and staring at Sam with sadness and it is cracking his cold heart he worked so hard to build up. He didn't want to send Dean into depression. I mean Jesus he just wanted to stop the kid from being so clingy. He adored and cherished his sons bond. He wouldn't change that for the world but sometimes Dean can go overboard with sheltering Sam. Yes, John knows that Sam needs sheltering but for kripes sake, the boy was 18 he was practically a grown man. Hell _is_ a grown man. He didn't need to be sheltered so fiercely anymore. When John infused and orders he didn't need Dean going and undoing that order by soothing Sam's broken heart.

He needed to get Sam ready and prepared and get these silly dreams out of his head before they get him killed.

"You ok John?" Bobby asked his friend as he watched John stare into space lost in thought.

"Huh," John muttered out as he looked to see who broke his trance. "What? Yeah."

"Alrighty then I think you know what to do." Bobby offered his lost friend.

"Yeah I know." John smiled a weak smile as he dug around for his cell phone. He needed to call Devin. They had to hurry to this hunt. This vour wasn't wasting time and was on a full-fledged killing spree.

"I'll be outside." John offered as he went to step outside to make the call. "Dean." He called across the room to get his attention.

He waited for a response but when he didn't get any he went on. "Pack your stuff son were going to leave by midnight." It looked almost as if Dean was ready to argue or scream but he settled back down. _At least he got one son in the reigns. _

Bobby isn't a man you scare easy but John's performance early on had him kinda wanting to run to his truck and high tail it back to South Dakota. Either John was taking acting classes behind his back or he actually had enough. He really was hoping it was the acting classes. It seemed as if John finally broke Dean even though Dean didn't need to be broken.

Dean was the epitome of perfect son. He watched how John and Dean interacted and how pride shone in John's eyes every time Dean performed each order. He just couldn't understand John's thinking and was starting to pick up Dean's earlier question. Was John really smoking crack?

* * *

Dean didn't want to go on this hunt he didn't want to go anywhere where Sam wasn't.

Sam needed him. He needed Sam. It was so simple yet he still couldn't believe his Dad couldn't understand that yet. He only trusted a select few in watching Sam and he means a select few. He really itches nervously every time he puts Sam in the hands of others that he _does _trust. And his Dad knows that. His Dad knows that it aggravates him so bad that he won't be able to focus on this hunt one bit. He'll be the liability and isn't that a fucking irony.

He chuckles a little at it because isn't that the ultimate screw you. His Dad was trying to avoid a liability and he'll just turn into one. His Dad must be smoking crack if he couldn't even think of that one.

He really wishes Sam would wake up so he could at least tell him good-bye and say his quiet whispered promises of _I'll be back _and _Don't worry. _However, it seems as if Sam just wants to sleep and he's content to just let him. He hopes that Devin will too and he hopes that he'll be able to give him a nice long talk before he goes. Of course a friendly talk of what he needs to do and emergencies of course. No threats or warnings. Nope. He wouldn't dare threaten to decapitate his head and use said head to feed to the fishes. Nah, that be wrong.

Dean finds a small smirk creep up on his face_. Sam would get a chuckle out of that. _His smirk quickly disappears into a frown. Sam looked horrible and he cursed his Dad for fucking even getting them into this mess. His brother was silent for weeks before their last hunt. He wasn't responding to his normal jibes or insults and he wasn't responding to John's orders.

Just as he thought things were getting normal and Sam was _finally _starting to laugh and smile, again his Dad goes and reams his ass out on the hunt. What the hell was he thinking? He just couldn't understand why his father couldn't decipher Sam being depressed from Sam just flat out ignoring him.

He just hoped that after Sam is fully healed that he will get to see room brightening smile and his infectious laugh again. He couldn't blame Sam if he never wanted anything to do with him or his Dad again he only hoped that their Dad didn't go fully over the edge this time with his idea or setting Sam straight.

Dean quickly twisted his wrist to check the time. The green neon light was flashing 11:36. He'd have to pack soon or his Dad would just yell at him the whole way their and he wasn't in the mood.

"Bobby." Dean called out as he went to stand.

"Hmm?"

"Can you watch Sam while I pack some things?" Dean asked with a grimace. _This is so wrong. _Everything about this decision is wrong.

"Sure, you just go get ready Sam will be fine." Bobby reassured as he got a good look at Dean's face. The kid looked like he hadn't slept or eaten anything in days. His normal cocky swagger was gone. He was just the form of a broken older brother and he could see the ever-increasing worry lines across his face. _God damnit John what did you do? _

"Thanks." Dean whispered as he gave one last solemn look at his brother before going to gather his things for the upcoming hunt. _Can't you just feel the excitement. _

* * *

Bobby plopped down on the stern motel chair where Dean was holed up in for the better part of five days. He instantly tried to shift to find a comfortable position but it was kinda hard when your backside felt like it was being stabbed with spikes. How the hell did Dean manage to sit on this thing 24/7 for five days? That just isn't fathomable.

He looked over at the youngest Winchester and was slightly distressed to see that his cheeks were starting to turn a rosy pink. Fever. Damnit. He said to himself as he thought of what he would have to give Devin to properly take care of the Winchesters most prized possession.

That is if only he follows through. When John frantically called him that night he said Sam was hurt on the hunt and it was bad. He never really thought nothing of it except that the werewolf was the culprit. I mean he was the only one with claws that could do that. Now though he isn't so sure. When Bobby tried to wiggle more information from John like _Where's Devin _or _I thought he went with you? _John just turned the conversation around and started to ramble incoherently. He knew John knew something he wasn't telling and he feared that it would just lead to more trouble.

"D'n?" A pain filled voice asked shaking Bobby out of his thoughts. He glanced down to see two fever glanced eyes look at him in confusion and fear.

"Sammy, its ok it's Bobby." Bobby reassured as he grabbed the lax hand on the bed. "Dean is doing something right now but he'll be back as soon as possible." Bobby added as Sam still searched the motel room for his lost brother. He figured either John or Dean would be the ones to tell Sam about there newest plan. It wasn't his right to barge in or have a say.

"P'sh m…e" Sam slurred as he tried to get his hidden message across.

"What?" Bobby asked confused as he tried to determine what Sam's fevered state was saying. "I can't understand you?"

"No…d'n. D't le…t hi'm." Sam slurred again caught in his delirium.

Bobby just sat with his eyebrows scrunched. Dean was more for the job at deciphering what a delirious Sam is saying. At this point, the only clear word he heard was 'him' and he can't quite figure out what Sam is so urgently trying to tell him.

"You have to speak clearer." Bobby pressed again now rather curious about what Sam was trying to tell him.

Sam let off with a last sigh as he tried to tell Bobby of the happenings of there last hunt. "De'in." He sighed out Devin's name as he fell back into unconsciousness.

Bobby brows turned form furrowed to concerned he can't be sure but he's kinda sure what Sam just said. _Devin. _Now why the hell would Sam (caught in a fever I might add) whisper out Devin's name. From what he knew, Devin and Sam didn't get along. That only raises questions and he hated unanswered questions.

"Is he ok?" Dean's voice broke through his deep thought as he looked from Sam to Dean seeing as Dean laid his bag by the door.

"Yeah, he woke for about five minutes but he was mumbling gitterish." Bobby said insistently. He didn't want to vent his fears and scare Dean before they even get to the damn hunt. That would be a bad hunt for all of them most importantly bad hunt for him.

Dean laughed a slight chuckle at Bobby's answer. "That's just Sammy talk I thought you could decode his language by now." Dean answered with a smile. He was happy his brother woke up even for those few precious minutes.

"Hmph…" Bobby muttered under his breath. "You damn Winchesters are the hardest bunch of people to decode and decipher."

Touché. Dean thought. He never really gave it thought but his brother and father could be tough eggs to crack even for him but someone who wasn't with them 24/7 would have a horrible time trying to piece together anything they said or did.

"You ready to go?" Bobby asked changing the subject.

"Yeah," Dean admitted quietly. "Bag's by the door I'm all ready." Dean waved his hand to notion his lone bag sitting by the door.

"Alight," Bobby said softly. "I'll step outside for a bit so you can say good-bye." Bobby said with a smile as he slowly got up from the chair and made his way to the door.

"Thank," Dean admitted again as he took over his normal vigil. Once he heard the soft click of the door, he dropped his mask. He was trying to be strong and act like he was somewhat ok with his Dad new plan. However, he wasn't and he wasn't holding it together as well as he liked.

"Sammy?" He questioned hoping to get his brother's attention for the few minutes he had left. "Sam can you wake up?" He asked quietly.

Sam's form was sifting as he tried to be pulled back to consciousness. His blearily eyes blinked open as he took in a face leering over him. At first, all he could see was bright red hair and the purposeful look of determination to kill him. He flinched back as so to get away but warn strong hands encased his own taking him back to the real world.

"Sammy calm down it's just me." Dean cooed as he held his brothers hand softly. Noticing the still confused look, he tried to get into his line of sight better.

Sam's fever dulled eyes tried to focus on the form but try as he might all he saw was a blurry blob. He didn't even need to see the figure once he heard that voice. He knew without a doubt who it was. Dean. "D'n?" He tried to call out to alert his brother of the threat still out there and the pain he was filling but all he got was a pressed finger to his lip telling him not to talk. _Well you sure wanted me to talk a week ago. _He thought bitterly.

"Sam I'm going on a hunt…" Dean gulped as he tried to continue. "I need to leave you here thought it's the safest route." Dean said quietly.

Sam's mind tried to piece together all this new information. Hunt. Dean leaving. Safe.

"It'll be ok, someone's going to be here to watch you and when I get back I'll take care of you I promise." Dean promised to his still confused sibling.

Someone else was going to be watching him? That didn't sound right and he didn't like where this conversation was going.

"Listen, you know my number you know 911 if anything goes wrong or happens you get to the phone as quick as you can. If you can't try other people's motels or try making a lot of noise someone will hear you." He had to get all his fears out and try to get Sam to focus enough to remember this important bit of information.

911? Now he was really confused. By the sound of Dean's voice, he was a bit terrified and worried and it scared Sam to see or more than rather hear his brother so broken.

"I'll be gone for a week's top and I kill this evil sonofabitch fast so we can get home." Dean sighed as he went on. "Listen I don't like this idea anymore than you do believe me but…" Dean stopped not knowing what to say. What as he going to tell Sam? I gave into Dad's order like a good little solider. He'll get so many I told you so's he might scream.

From what Sam's mind could comprehend, Dean was going on a hunt and would be gone for a week. A week without Dean but who would he spend the week with? Dean told him that someone else was watching him and he hoped Dean just forgot to say it was Bobby.

"I'll be back I promise. Stay safe and if anything happens just try to make it to a phone. Ok?" Dean asked as Sam just continued to stare at him. Shit Sam was still too confused to comprehend a damn word he was saying.

The door opening brought his attention to who was entering and his face suddenly turned lethal as he saw whom. Devin.

"So what I miss?"

* * *

**Dean's worried to the gills. Bobby's suspicious. John's secretive. Devin's cocky and calm all while Sam is still confused. How will this play out? I know hehe. Next chapter I assure you, we will see Devin and Dean's nice chat and I'm pretty sure some more of Sam's point of view. The next couple of chapters I can already tell you will be split byt what Devin and Sam are doing and what John, Dean and Bobby are doing on the hunt. Hope your still liking. Feedback is appreciated. Thanx Charity**


	7. Chapter 7

**Authors Note:** So the last six chapters I've spent building up to the stories climax and finally we are starting to get there with this chapter. We will see Devin's POV and Sam's. Plus we get to check up on the hunt at hand and see what our three fabulous men are doing and if there handling this well. So hope I didn't bore you out with the last six chapters and like I said everything has a right time for unveiling so have patience and have faith as John hasn't completely and utterly failed yet I promise and Dean won't be the good little solider for long. Thanx Charity.

* * *

Dean still couldn't contain the growl that escaped past his lips as Devin's cocky voice hit his ears. When his Dad shot him a warning glance from behind he didn't care. This big shot thinks he can waltz in and make amends for what he's done in the past? That doesn't play out in Dean Winchester's rule book. Especially when he broke the most important rule of all. He dared hurt his brother.

"So Dean I guess I'm gonna be babysitting for a week." Devin gave a shaky laugh as Dean's piercing stare almost made him want to piss himself.

John cleared his throat at all the tension and awkwardness seeing as his eldest son clearly still wanted to kick Devin's ass and seeing as he himself still had the urge too this wasn't going to end out good unless they split fast. "Dean would you ever so _kindly _explain to Devin how to take care of Sam for the week while I put our things in the car?" John asked in a stern tone trying to break up the stare down that was going on.

"I could do that." Dean replied with a cold smile almost overjoyed by the notion. "Just come over here and I'll show you." He smiled even more as Devin's face paled considerably. It would be the jackpot if he could get the guy to piss himself.

"Su…sur…sure." Devin stammered as he made his way over to Sam's bed all thoughts he had conjured the previous night flew straight out of his head at Dean's cold and lethal smile.

John just shivered at his eldest almost homicidal smile but he pushed it aside knowing if he didn't give Dean a chance to talk to Devin…Dean wouldn't come. He gathered the bags as he strode out the door.

* * *

Once Dean heard the click his smile turned into a deepened frown as he rose from his perched position on the chair. Though Devin was taller than him he still had more weight than him and definitely wouldn't hesitate to break the guy's nose again. He crossed his arms over his chest as he spoke smoothly. "So…you got my Dad wrapped around your little finger don't you?"

Devin smirked at that. "I don't have anyone wrapped around any finger. Me and John are friends. Just like me and you are friends and just like me and Sammy there are friends."

"Don't call him Sammy!" Dean quickly lashed out. Was Devin asking for a broken nose? "We are so not friends dude and you and Sam I know for sure aren't friends."

"Dean I'm offended." Devin said putting on a hurt look.

"Sorry for your broken heart but we got to lay some ground rules." Dean tuted as he circled around Devin's skinny form.

"What you don't trust me?" Devin said cockily as he put on his casual smirk. Going to lean on the far wall.

"Bingo give the kid a golden star." Dean chanted as a slight smile lit his lips. "After the last trick you pulled I would never trust you again." The smile disappeared to be replaced with a frown.

Well the brat deserved it. Devin thought evilly. The kid was useless, pathetic, and all around a waste of space yet his family is so damn blind to the cause. John though is turning around and he's very happy for the change. He thought back then Dean would too but he soon learned that if Sam would sneeze Dean would be there in a flat second with a tissue. It makes him sick. "It was a little love tap besides I said I was sorry and I let anger get the best of me. No harm no foul." Devin said smiling while holding out his hands in a placating gesture.

No harm no foul my ass. "Yeah a love tap. I don't care if you pinched him it still would have been the same outcome." Dean said with a sneer. Remembering the scene all to well.

Ah good times. Devin thought. That damn broken nose pestered him for weeks and he was forced to wear the most hideous of nose braces to re-align it. "You know I forgive you for that."

Sure ya do you sorry ass liar. "So any way ground rules remember?"

"Yes, yes what are the rules in the book of taking care of Samm-er-Sam?" Devin asked smoothly almost letting Sammy slip out. There would be time to call Sam, Sammy. He just wait till Dean left then he could unleash all the Sammy's he wanted. He almost made him feel giddy.

"Rule number one you hurt him in any way, shape or form I'll find you and hunt you down and you'll wish that on the last hunt the werewolf got a hold of you before me." Dean said with seriousness. Pure hatred gleaming out of his eyes.

Devin actually started to sweat at the look in Dean's eyes. He felt the all too familiar punch from Dean when he was younger he didn't want to feel it now when he was older, smarter, bigger, and stronger. "Please continue."

"Check his wound hourly and re -bandage it. Even though it's clean of infection now he's showing signs of one so you have to re-bandage it." Dean reminded as he instilled instructions in Devin's dead beat brain. If he got back from the hunt to find all his instructions for naught he would never forgive himself or his father.

"I got this Dean I cleaned wounds before." Devin said matter-of-factly all while leaning against the far wall.

"In this bag over here," Dean pointed to a duffle sitting by Sam's bed. "It holds fluids and blood. Sam has an I.V hooked up already and I don't think he needs any more blood but he does need fluids so you have to change it out when the bag runs out." Dean insisted as this was a vital piece of information to keep Sam healthy and alive.

"Yes I know Dean I've dealt with one before." Devin said with a yawn. He was getting bored with Dean's tone acting like he was a child. Hell he was older than Dean. He learned this stuff before Dean could breathe. (Well maybe not that young but you get the picture)

Did he just yawn? Was he boring Devin so bad? How dare he the little bastard. This is important. Dean's face turned red as he made a step forward to just grab his shirtfront instill in his whacked out mind that Sam was important and to pay attention. But as soon as his fingers brushed fabric his Dad's voice boomed out.

"Dean!" John said hurriedly seeing as Devin must have pissed Dean off already. Geez new record only 10 minutes. He laughed to himself as he made his way over to the two to break them up. Stepping in between he looked at his son and saw pure fury written across it. _Oh boy was this going to be a fun car ride or what?_

"Dean?" He asked softly pushing Dean back a little. "It's time to go; I think you should go tell Sammy good-bye." John offered to his enraged son.

Dean's face fell as he heard he ran out of time.

He still didn't know if Sam understood him or forgave him.

He still didn't know if Devin absorbed the information or if he just ignored it.

He still didn't know about this damn decision.

Dean sighed as did Devin. He wasn't worth it at least not now. He walked over to his siblings bed ready to tell him good-bye.

* * *

Settling into the familiar chair again he was a bit agitated that he had an audience this time. Devin the freaky bastard was smirking as he stayed in he same spot leaning against the wall. _Good he wants to stay he can hear this. _Dean cleared his throat as he picked up the cool lax hand. "Sammy?" He asked hoping to get some type of response out of his brother and was a bit surprised when his eyes fluttered open. At least the infection hasn't taken full force yet. Dean breathed a sigh of relief. Maybe it will just pass over.

"Wha? D'n…li't hu't" Sam mumbled out trying to move his head the light piercing into his throbbing skull. When did his head hurt?

At first Dean furrowed his brow at the mess of words flopping out but it only took seconds for him to run them through his head. _The light hurts. _"It's ok I'll fix it." He soothed as he tuned around to his silent onlooker. "Hit the lights will ya?" He got a muttered grunt in response as he turned back to his brother. He was relieved that Sam seemed a bit more coherent but he knows better than any one to be prepared for anything.

When they were bathed in total darkness except for the small bathroom light gleaming out onto there faces he gently cupped Sam's head as he tuned it back towards him. "Sammy do you remember us talking earlier?" He asked.

Sam's face scrunched in confusion. Talk? What talk?

"About me going away for a week to hunt." Dean continued hoping it would rejog Sam's memory.

Oh that talk. Sam still didn't know who was watching him but he trusted Dean wouldn't leave him with someone dangerous. He trusted Dean. Dean would take care of it. His eyes started to drift close until he was shook awake. He whimpered slightly at not being able to rest his head.

"Stay awake just for a few more minutes." Dean pleaded. "Sam I'm leaving now and I wanted to say good-bye. Ok? I'll be back in a week I promise remember what I told you." Dean said softly as a silent tear fell down his face at the still hurt look on his brother. He leaned in closer so to whisper into his brother's ear. "Don't worry, It'll be ok I promise. I love you. I'll be back." He soothed as he leaned in gently to kiss his brothers forehead. Once he leaned back Sam was sound asleep and it broke his heart into two. Turning around he saw the figure emerge from the shadows a satisfied grin on his face.

His face instantly turned red at the thought this prick was getting amusement out of this. His fist started to clench but he stopped suddenly. He wasn't worth it. "You better take care of him or so help me go-" He whispered but was stopped by his Dad's form in the door. Damn Dad you have bad timing.

"Take a chill pill, It'll be fine." Devin reminded. Smiling as Dean slumped his shoulders.

"Dean you ready?" John called from the door.

"Yeah," Dean admitted looking back at his slumbering sibling. "Aren't you going to say anything to him?" Dean asked accusingly.

John dragged a shaky hand over his face. What could he say? I got you into this mess. I'm leaving you into the hands of the guy who did this to you. He couldn't say anything except he was a lousy ass father but Sammy already knew that. "No." He admitted.

Dean just gave him a biting glare before pushing past him. He looked towards Devin and gave him a stern full nod. "Take care of my boy and remember what me and Dean told you. I don't think you want to head down that road Devin." John warned for the final time as Devin emerged to him cocky smile in place.

"It'll be fine. I promise." Devin reassured as John just gave him an unsatisfied nod and shut the door.

Devin smiled as he heard the familiar growl of the Chevy start up and take off down to the hunt. Devin stepped toward the wall where the door was flicking on the bright overhead light. "Rise and shine Sammy boy. This is going to be a fun filled week."

* * *

**EEK we now know Devin is only a cocky prick. What is he going to do to Sammy? Sam's POV is coming next as he realizes who he got left alone with. Also coming is Bobby's, John's, and Dean's mixed POV's on the hunt and there young counterpart they left behind. So what ya think? Also I want to mention this vour it is real and it is based in Idaho that's the only real part about it lol. So when I start getting into as ways to kill it, appearance, etc. that's all me so stay with me on that you may find it shocking or scary or hilarious. Feedback is appreciated. Thanx Charity. **


	8. Chapter 8

**Authors Note: **All I can say is WOW I didn't expect this story to garner the type of response it did. To tell you all a little story this was a somewhat partial dream I had way before I ever dreamed of writing fan fiction. I'm so happy with how it's going and with a little discussion with IritIlan It really has me excited about this story and about the general concept because the concept was fairly hidden but you could still see it underneath the depth. The concept of change. I want you to think and visualize about the concept of change because every character is going to change in this story. We all make mistakes and were not perfect and I find it fascinating to unveil the imperfect side in all of us alla the Winchesters each of them have there own secrets and burdens and this story shows it. Just a hint about concepts of the general background and layout. Thanx Charity.

* * *

Sam whimpered when the bright light came searing through his closed lids. What the hell game is Dean playing? I don't like this game too much. He tried turning his head away from the light but it was all for naught it was everywhere making his head hurt worse. At least it dulls the throb in my side. Sam joked to himself finally blinking his hazy eyes open taking stock of the dirty white ceiling. Hmm never really noticed how the water stain up there looks like Elvis.

Didn't Dean tell him he was going on a hunt anyway? If his (obviously so) hazy mind remembers Dean specifically said he's going on a hunt and had to get someone else to watch him. Or at least that's what he deciphered out of the one-sided conversation. How can he even be sure that was a real conversation? Why would Dean leave him in the hands of someone else? That wasn't like Dean. It was just…wrong. Though he knows Dean has to answer to there Dad, it still hurt that the hunt was more important than he was. What else is new? Sam thought bitterly.

Where is this so-called babysitter anyway?

"Rise and shine Sammy boy. This is going to be a fun filled week."

Sam froze his constant questions at the voice that sliced through the room. That is definitely not Dean. He didn't want to take his eyes away from the Elvis blob on the ceiling for fear that his eyes will confirm his inner nightmare. He knows that voice, knows it too well in fact. The smooth cockiness of it so different from his brother's cockiness. This kinda cocky was cold, unforgiving, and relentless. Over the years, he just thought he was crazy because every time that voice talked to him he heard the same tone of hate and pity. When he looked to his brother and Dad for recognitions that they heard the same tone they both would just give him weird looks. He knows all to well that, _that _tone is reserved only for him.

Now he knows why Dean sounded broken, why he was talking about 911. He knows and it still hurts. It hurts worse then any werewolf or hard push at your back can administer. Dean must have known yet he left him with Devin anyway. There Dad didn't even care anymore that much was clear from his back lashing on the hunt. A small tear slipped down his cheek. _I'm sorry. _

"Is my Sammy crying? Jeez you are a baby aren't ya kid?" Devin teased as tears began to fall down Sam's face. He walked closer to the bed so he could plop down in the chair.

Sam tried to control the sob that escaped because he knows from past experiences that Devin doesn't like it when he cries. He cried once before in front of him and all he got was a black eye. He heard someone sit in the chair next to him and he knew already that it was him. He was alone and he was scared.

"What's wrong anyway did Daddy not shower you with kisses when he left?" Devin teased again knowing that was a sensitive subject with Sam. Bringing up not getting affection from his father always warranted anger but in Sam's broken state it would probably make him sink lower.

No he didn't. Sam thought sadly. His Dad didn't talk to him at all. "Just leave me alone." He muttered out not taking his eyes off the Elvis blob.

"No can do Sammy boy. I'm watching you for a whole week and we have some things to do." Devin admitted excitedly. If they think, Devin was going to conform to the Winchester way of healing a wound then there wrong. He knows more by the book ways, ways that will guarantee survival. Ways that Sam Winchester needs to learn.

Sam finally turned his head to meet the cocky smirk. The bright red hair standing out against his pale face. Things to do? What the hell did Devin expect him to do? He still had 54 stitches in his side. All because of him nonetheless! "What do you mean?" Sam asked fearfully. He knows Devin. Knows how his mind works. He knows that Devin likes things hard so he can work for them. He likes to go by the book by a more less than familiar way. Let's just sat the guy wasn't normal.

"Sam you're holed up in a motel room on the verge of an infection and you think this will help you get better?" Devin said exasperated waving towards the bed and I.V pole.

"Uh yeah I kinda was hoping it will. Besides what the hell do you care didn't you want this to happen anyway?" Sam asked bitterly. Why the hell would he be concerned over his health? He was the one who pushed him toward the damn werewolf.

Devin laughed a low deep laugh as he titled his head back.

Sam flinched back from the cold laugh as if slapped. Well isn't that nice. "I mean…" Sam tried to pick words to say. Trying to be wary about how he approaches Devin. He doesn't want to tick him off involuntarily. "What did you have in mind I can't move around without busting the stitches Devin?" Sam sighed knowing that the only way to survive this week was to do what Devin said. But why even try? It's not as if he has a family to go to anyway. They both obviously saw what happened. Right? So they didn't care at all if he got hurt again. The hunt came first.

"I like it when your obedient you've been learning Sammy." Devin retorted with a smile.

"Well I try."

"First of all we need to teach you survival rules if this ever is too happen again." Devin stated moving up from the chair going over to the I.V pole.

"Survival rules? Isn't that a bit drastic I mean what are the chances of it happening again?" Sam said fearfully trying to track Devin's movements but any shift he made only sent jolts of pain up through his side.

"Nope." Devin replied flatly. "Now rule number one learn to survive without this." Devin said reaching for Sam's hand to pull out the I.V.

"Uh… Devin is that such a good idea?" Sam said his breathing picking up. He tried to tug his hand away but his limbs weren't cooperating. He isn't stupid he needs fluids because he knows for certain he hasn't had a drink or anything to eat in days.

"Of course it is just hold still." Devin said squinting his eyes. He slowly pulled the I.V out of Sam's hand, which garnered a small whimper. He threw the I.V down in disgust at how dependent the world has gotten now a days.

Devin was anything but gentle as he pulled his I.V out. It poked and prodded inside his skin before finally slipping free. He let a small whimper escape but shut his mouth as Devin's angry face met his. "So now what?" He asked as he licked his dry lips. He would love a drink right about now but he knows not to ask unless Devin offers something. He can feel the blood trickle down his hand from where the I.V once been and it makes him nauseas. He was sick for the first couple of days when they brought him here, he remembers that because there were always buckets lined by his bed and Dean's gentle hands rubbing his back until the heaving stopped. He can't throw up now he just can't. So he swallows back the acid bile as he takes a shaky breath.

"Now we adjust your bed setting because I believe the key to getting healthy is all done while sitting up ready to face another attacker not be taken by surprise by laying down." Devin said with true honesty.

Now Sam was terrified. His side hurt just by laying down and he wanted him to sit up. Knowing Devin, he would want him to eat, sleep, and breathe sitting up for the whole week. He didn't like this idea at all. "No…no…now wait a minute just wait." He stammered trying to look intimidating lying flat on his back but Devin's footsteps kept coming until they hit his arms. "Listen I don't think this is-" He stopped as a scream ripped through him. The pain was so intense as Devin hoisted him up into a sitting position. He closed his eyes trying to breathe through his nose but it wasn't working. He was running out of oxygen as his chest tried to work overtime to get him more. His head became dizzy as black spots danced around his vision. The last thing he heard was Devin's voice telling him he didn't bust his stitches. Well how fan-fucking-tastic for him.

* * *

Dean sat in the back of the Impala watching as rain drizzled down the side of the window. His stomach was cramping painfully as they drove farther and farther away from Sam. His Dad reassured him though that they wouldn't be that far. They would still be in Idaho. It still didn't settle his stomach as the car drove at a steady 50 mph. He could feel it in the air a tension so thick it almost made it impossible to breathe. He wishes he did stop breathing then maybe there Dad would just call off the damn hunt and take them back to Sam. Take them back where they should be at the moment. But ever valiant they traveled onward. There was no music, no talking and worst of all it was just too silent.

He wanted so badly to just scream at his Dad. Tell him how wrong this all is. How his instincts were wrong this time. That he has to man up and finally admit John Winchester was wrong he was dead wrong. He just can't do it. He still has that glimmer of hope that his Dad has all the answers. That he can make it all better by the flick of the wrist or the sure look on his face.

Dean sighed as he adjusted in the back seat. _Damn it's uncomfortable back here. _How the hell does Sam manage to sit back here day in and day out with those long legs of his?

His thoughts wondered back to his brother again and he cursed himself for bringing it up. He wanted to clear his mind so he can focus on this hunt. He wouldn't be any use to Sam when he got back if he too got himself injured.

Dean cleared his throat as he began to speak. "So Dad can you tell me more about the hunt?"

* * *

John jumped as Dean's voice rang from the back. He wasn't expecting any talking or conversations for the night. Bobby was chalk silent as he sat beside him staring idly out the window. He must have pissed Bobby off too. He took Dean's light questions for what it was. A truce. "Sure, were hunting a vour that's why I needed you on this hunt Dean."

Dean's face tightened as his dad reminded him of the circumstances. "Yeah I know just get to the good stuff would ya."

John grimaced at Dean's change of tone. _Nice move there John. _"Yeah, it's nasty apparition that feeds on fear and eats the flesh of the living." John explained slowly. Watching as Dean just seemed to not listen.

"Go on." Dean urged.

"They usually attack at night that's when people are most terrified, but this one is going off pattern and I can't seem to figure out why. Or how for that matter." John truly was stumped. A vour got its jollies scaring the holy hell out of someone so they give themselves a heart attack then after they would just feed on the dead flesh. He doesn't seem to get how this thing is attacking during the day in a busy city.

"Maybe it's scared of the dark too." Dean chuckled at his own joke but silenced at his fathers stern glare. He wished Bobby would just say something so he wouldn't have to make up dialogue right now.

"That's not funny we need to figure this out fast. The death count is rising son were at 12 people already." John said seriously. Vour's usually get bored as well. They don't stay this long in a city that has him a bit suspicious but he's more than certain this is there culprit.

"Day or night does it really matter how it's doing the dirty work? We go in kill the sonofabitch we go home. Done deal. Besides faster we get done faster we can get back to Sam." Dean said the last part quietly as he stopped talking. He didn't feel like talking anymore. He had his game plan.

"I know." John commented softly. They had to get this over with fast. All it took was salt iron rounds to kill the things. The only damn bad part is there faster than lightning. Life is never easy.

John said to himself sadly, as he turned to see his friend had fallen asleep. He chuckled softly as he figured all that damn jack daniels wiped him clean. He glanced hesitantly in the rearview mirror to see Dean staring blankly out the window. Perfect. This is going to be the best hunt ever I can feel it in my bones. John just pressed on the gas harder to get closer to there destination.

* * *

**Oh no we know what Devin is doing and is seems as if Sam is just giving in or is he? I have many trick up my sleeve that will shock you. Many many twist and turns for this story await you. I just want to say now I have no idea how long this is going to be none whatsoever I just know where this is all going to end. So please forgive if this winds up being past like 20 chapters or something do to me building scenes and stuff. Remember my rule of not everything is at it seems and wait for things to be unveiled at the right time. Also patience my young readers patience and reading will be highly enjoyable. Feedback is appreciated. Thanx Charity**


	9. Chapter 9

**Authors Note:** I'm so sorry this was so late I hit a major road block. Not with my creative thinking but with mom and pops. So I had to halt writing for a while till I got it all cleared. Luckily I'm cleared and I hope I can get these faster. Again sorry but you know those blockages. Thanx Charity

* * *

He couldn't breathe.

His lungs ached with the force it took to drag in a single breath. Each breath grating and wheezing past his lips. He hungered for more. Every time he managed one his side throbbed in retribution. Sweat falling down his face with the effort to just friggin breathe! He could tell he was still sitting up or slumped over is more like it. He really wishes that his Dad was completely wrong about this hunt and he has to make an unexpected trip home because if he's been honest with himself he doesn't think he'll last a week. He could tell infection has already set in and without antibiotics he's dead meat. Not to mention the breathing problem. Isn't that what his family wanted though? To just leave him behind and finally kiss his ass goodbye.

Sam finally peeled open his eyes to see blurry objects about the room. He figured it was from lack of oxygen that was cutting of his 20/20 vision. He was a bit dismayed to find that his eyes were crusted over. _That can't be good. _Blinking a few times to try and clear his vision he focused in on a figure hunched over in the corner. He knew who it was right away but he tried to see what the hell he was doing. Blinking more rapidly so he can see what Devin was focusing so hard on he gasped as his eyes caught the sight. Devin was sharpening a blade a very long and sharp blade I might add. Sam swallowed convulsingly willing his stomach to stop turning. _Calm down he's not going to kill you at least not that way. Oh god Dean please get back here soon. _

"You awake Sammy?" Devin asked with what almost sounded like concern. Sam laughed at the show. Devin was a good liar when he wanted to be.

"Co-could you aa-t lea-least ge-t me som-e ox-gen?" Sam panted out of breath from the simple sentence. He felt like he was a 12 year old who had asthma.

Devin's eyebrows crinkled in confusion at Sam's struggling form. Trying to take in every bit of information he could he narrowed in on his figure. Sam was hunched over in the bed a slight wheeze emitting itself. He could clearly see the sweat starting to fall and he knew that Sam had an infection now. He smiled with pleasure. "Sammy looks like you caught yourself an infection." He said loudly as he set his blade down and strolled to the bed.

"Ya th-think." Sam said incredulously. He tried to straighten up better as he heard him approach but that only resulted in a deep wet cough beginning to sprout out from his throat. His eyes shot open in fear as he couldn't breathe. He couldn't get any oxygen in. Both hands immediately flung to his side to protect it from any damage but it wasn't helping. His body shook with force as a wet gurgling sound made a presence. _Oh god don't tell me I caught pneumonia. That's all I need. _He felt strong's arms engulf his back as they started beating it. He yelped at the sudden thump but it was helping get whatever was lodged in his throat out.

"Cough it out damnit!" Devin yelled repeatedly thumping Sam's back as he coughed his head off. He wanted to make his recovery a clean one. One without the help of any medical tools but if Sam had pneumonia he might have to take him to the hospital but that's only _if. _

He stopped his thumping when the coughs turned into groans. "That's it, spit that shit out kid." He said with a smirk going over to the other side to see Sam's face.

Sam stuttered out breaths as he tried to settle his beating heart. Mucus mixed with he didn't even want to know hung from his lips as he tried to pull in enough oxygen before he passed out again. He really wanted to lie down and sleep for a week hell a year but he was getting worse.

"Eww," Devin complained as he saw the mucus drip from Sam's face. "That shit's gross." He thought about getting a towel or something but found it easier to wipe it on the bedspread. _Hey he ain't cleaning up. _"Wipe that gunk off on the bedspread." He demanded but was dismayed that he was ignored. Sam just seemed content to sit-er- hunch and breathe. He started to bite his fingernail absently. No, it was ok Sam was fine just the flu or something. "Here," Devin offered as he began to wipe Sam's mouth. He was horrified to find blood mixed in with the mucus. "Shit." He whispered to himself wiping away the sticky substance.

"Wh't is I…..t?" Sam drawled off trying to focus on just breathing. His chest hurt and his side was on fire. He didn't know if it was sweat but there was sure a bunch of liquid running down his side.

"Nothing, just don't worry kid." Devin stammered he didn't know what to do. He caused this and if John or Dean found out. He didn't even want to know the consequences.

"D'n?" Sam whined out. His side was hurting, his head hurt, his chest ached and his shirt was wet. He needed a new shirt.

Devin looked up at Sam's cry for Dean. Double shit the kids even more out of it. "What?" He asked almost fearful of the response.

"W'y my si'e we't?" Sam slurred listing sideways till hands caught him.

"Your side is wet?" Devin said in a rush of words. _Shitshitshit. _"Let me see." He questioned moving over to Sam's left side. He threw the blankets away and gasped at the growing red spot. Sam busted his stitches. "Shit!" He yelled frantically as he ran around the room gathering together his things and a couple of Sam's.

"Wh't wr'g?" Sam asked dismayed by the blurry blob's frantic movements. They were making his head spin.

"Your Dad and brother are gonna have my ass for dinner. Come on little man we have to go to a hospital." He said as he gently began lifting Sam into his arms.

Sam's eyes shot open at the different position. Where was he again? Why was someone carrying him bridal style? When the figure started moving he didn't remember much else because the pain in his side became too much and he welcomed the coming darkness.

* * *

Dean sat in the motel unhappily as his Dad and Bobby scouted out the area and talked to witnesses. His Dad offered for him to go in fact wanted him to go. Any other time he would have been overjoyed but he was pissed and moody. A pissed and moody Dean doesn't want to go anywhere. He sat fingering the long forgotten beer in his hands and he just wanted the damn thing to give him a buzz. Something to knock his ass out for the night. If only Bobby didn't drink all the damn jack.

His mind kept wondering back to Sam no matter how hard he tried. Talking to him after Dad reamed his ass out his brother seemed despondent and almost tired. He wanted to tell him something. Told him that he would after this hunt. "Yeah," Dean snorted. "Look how well that went." He was left wondering just what Sam wanted to tell him. If Sam would ever get the chance too.

"_Sammy you ok?" Dean asked hesitantly as he approached his brother's form. _

"_Yeah I'm just fine Dean." Sam said with a crack in his voice. _

"_Sure you are, you just need to save the daydreaming for the shower kiddo. You know that get's Dad all fussy." Dean tried to somewhat reprimand Sam as there Dad told him time and time again don't feed Sam's wild and crazy dreams. He needed to crack down and make Sam learn that those dreams can't come true. How could he? How could he break Sam's heart into a million pieces? How could he just crush someone's hopes and wants? He had his own albeit they were a bit different than Sam's but he still had hopes and dream's. _

"_I'm just…tired Dean. I'm tired." Sam stated flatly his shoulders slumping. _

"_Then why didn't you sleep longer. I told you to stay in bed-" Dean stopped as he realized Sam's meaning of the word 'tired'. _

"_I'm tired of it all Dean I just want out." Sam stated dejectedly. _

"_Sammy…" Dean didn't know what to say. His brother complained and whined but he never sounded so broken and so lost. _

"_I've been thinking real hard over this and I've made up my mind." Sam said with a slight smile. _

"_About what? What are you talking about?" Dean asked confused. Made up his mind? Was Sam leaving him? That thought struck his heart as it had him almost clinging to his brother so he wouldn't go. _

"_I'll tell you after the hunt. Somewhere private I promise." Sam said as his smile fell. _

"_Ok I'll be there to listen." Dean smiled as Sam perked up. He gave him a slight squeeze on the shoulder as he turned back around. _

"_There it is boys!" He heard his father's gruff voice yell. Dean quickly turned his smile into one of determination. Keeping Sam directly behind him he stated. "Go time." _

_

* * *

_

The memory was too vivid. His brother's pain was clearly washing through and Dean just brushed it off thinking Sam was in an emo mood do to his Dad's yelling fit. He was wrong. There was something more and he should have picked it up sooner or made him tell right then and there. Maybe he would have been persuaded to stay with Sam then go on this fucked up hunt.

The door opening shook him out of his grief as he looked up to find his Dad and Bobby trudge in. "Well anything?" He asked fingering the glass bottle.

John's eyebrow shot up at the sight his son made but brushed it off. "Yeah, I'm certain now we got a vour on our hands."

"You got more of those beers Dean I'm gonna need one." Bobby said playfully as he settled himself across from Dean. The pain in his eyes almost broke his resolve.

"You wish." Dean said playfully. His pocket vibrating stopped the banter for a moment. He snaked his hand in his pocket to grab his cell phone.

"Hello?" He asked in a somewhat defensive manor. The number he didn't recognize and he wasn't about to tell whoever this was who he was.

"_Is this Dean?" _

Dean's face crinkled into a hard mask. "Who's asking?" He said coldly. His Dad and Bobby both stopped talking and conversating focusing on his conversation.

"_This is Dr. Wallace at St. Luke's Boise regional medial center. A patient of mine was dropped off and has no family or friend contacts with him and we need someone here right now. He is a minor and your number was on his contact list." _

Dean's eyes widened as realization dawned. Oh god Sammy. "Yes this is him. Is he ok? Is Sam ok?" Dean asked fearfully as he sat up abruptly knocking down the chair in succession. He began to walk around the room and gather together all his things. Fear and worry over road rage and fury. That's tucked away for later.

"_I can't really discuss patient confidentiality over the phone you need to get here." _

"Please he's my little brother." Dean begged as he dropped his duffle by the door noticing Bobby's and his Dad's concerned look. He shot his Dad and angry growl as he continued listening.

"_Listen he's stable and that's about as much we can do for now. I'll tell you everything as soon as you get here and you can answer my questions. Ok?" _

"Ok," Dean whispered. "I'll be there in an hour." Dean promised even though the drive was about two hours and 30 minutes. He'd make it in an hour. He closed the phone and shoved it back into his pocket. He immediately spun around on his father as his face lit up with fury.

"YOU!" Dean yelled pointing a finger in his fathers face.

"Dean what happened, what's wrong with Sam?" John asked fearfully as he took a step back. From what he could gather Sam was in the hospital. _Oh god what have I done. _

"This is all your fault! You and your stupid hunt and your stupid plans. Well congratulations _John_ Sam's in the fucking hospital now and I don't even know if he's going to be alive when I get there." Dean yelled as he felt Bobby's hands rest on his shoulders.

"Dean I'm-" John started but was surprised when a punch landed squarely with his jaw. He grunted as he fell back a step. "I guess I deserve that."

"You deserve much more but I don't have time for you. You stay with your stupid precious hunt and finish what you started. I don't want to see you near Sam again you hear me!" Dean yelled his vein pulsing in his neck.

"Dean you can't say that." John tried as he wanted to reason with his son. He wanted to see his youngest healthy and happy.

"No, I mean it you stay away I'm taking the Impala and going to that hospital and if I see you there I swear to god I'll take care of you myself." Dean threatened.

"Now wait a minute he's my son and you have no right to-" Another hit came into contact with his face as he grunted from the unexpected pain. He began to fume with anger. His son was taking control. He was in control.

"You listen your wasting my time to get to Sam so do us all a favor and stay gone." Dean said coldly as he marched past his father and slammed the door.

"Dean wait!" John yelled but it was too late he heard the familiar rumble of the Chevy starting up and squealing out of the parking lot.

He looked over to Bobby as he let tears escape. "What have I done?"

* * *

**On no is John doomed forever? What is that little secret that Sam is trying to tell? Where the hell did Devin go? And why is Bobby drinking all the jack? The world may never know. Feedback is appreciated. Thanx Charity**

**P.S revision chapter fixed my boo boo's :)**


	10. Chapter 10

**Authors Note: **I want to warn you all now I am horrible with medical expertise and anything pertaining to it. I will try my best though with all the machine thingies and craziness that goes with it. All the medical talk has me for a loop and I wish I could portray it better but alas I suck. So I hope I satisfy you enough with my descriptions. Also I must tell all of you that I know I make little boo boo's here and there and I have a ocd for that shit because it bugs the hell out of me. So I'm going back fixing a few of my errors I.E grammar, spelling. I'm not changing the story just fixing mistakes and replacing the chapters after all boo boo's are fixed so if you ever wanted to read again you'll have the pleasure of a cleaner boo boo free story. I know it's not necessary but it's more for me than you. Leave my ocd alone lol. Thanx Charity

* * *

Pulling swiftly up to St. lukes Dean wasn't even sure if he shut the car off or not he just flung out of the car as he ran into the hospital doors. He knew he must be making a scene but at the moment he really couldn't give a shit. The only thing on his mind was Sam. After that was beating the holy hell out of Devin then maybe road hauling him after he's done knocking all his teeth out. Yep that sounds satisfying.

The waiting room was fairly quiet and he thanked God that he wouldn't have to be scrutinized while he sat there waiting for Sam or paced while waiting or maybe just paced and waited while he lost his friggin mind! Walking up to the desk he cringed as the nurse flinched away from him and he had to remind himself to calm down or no one would let him see Sam.

"May I help you?" The nurse stammered out as she had one hand resting on the telephone waiting to call help if needed.

"Yes my brother he was admitted here, Sam Winchester, I need to know if he's alright." Dean blurted out and he relaxed as the nurses face melted into a smile. _Charming the women already Sammy._

"Ah Sam Winchester yes he's in surgery right now sweetie. Is you father here?" She asked calmly digging around for a clipboard to hand him paperwork.

"No I can handle it I'm over 21. I can answer any and all questions." Dean said sternly taking the handed clipboard. "You said he's in surgery?"

"Yes he just got in he might be awhile."

"What for?" Dean asked confused. The only injury Sam had was that slice to his side. The only reason he see fit to be in surgery would be that the stitches busted open. Which the stitches shouldn't of busted open because Sam should have been resting comfortably in bed. That reminded him of Devin's skinny ass. Where the hell is he? Sam had to get here somehow. He couldn't have just walked.

"It's not my right to say. I'll page his doctor as soon as he's done ok." The nurse said warmly smiling the whole time.

Dean returned the smile still looking around the waiting room thinking Devin was just hiding now that he made an entrance. _Alright show your punk ass. _

"Uh sir are you alright?"

"Yeah…yeah," Dean said while scratching his head. "Did anyone come with Sam when he got admitted?"

"Yes he got dropped off by a young man but when we went to ask him questions about Sam he wasn't there."

Dean's face tightened at the thought. Sam was alone this whole time. Confused. Lost. Hurt. "What did he look like?" He asked with a hint of venom.

"Uh…I remember he had bright red hair." The nurse asked with confusion.

Bingo. Forget the road hauling a bullet to the brain is more promising. Right after he carves his brain out first. "Thank you." He said waving the clipboard at her face. "Please notify me on anything about Sam."

"Will do just fill that out and bring it back."

Dean nodded his head as he made his way over to the chairs. He sat down trying to get comfortable so he could focus on the paper. It really was a fruitless attempt his brain was on overdrive. His emotions running rampant in each different direction. Worry, fear, anger, hate, fury, betrayal, mistrust. It was beginning to give him a headache.

Looking on the paper he answered the easy questions as Sam's name which Devin blew any cover he had to use an insurance card by giving out Sam's real name. His date of birth May 2, 1983. Which wasn't that coming up soon? Allergic to any medications? Nope not that he knows of.

A tap on the shoulder shook him out of his reservoir as he looked up into a warm smiling face. It wasn't the nurse from the desk but a man in his early fifties with slicked back hair. "Dean?" The man asked tasking off one of his blood covered gloves.

Dean's stomach almost rebelled for a second. "Yes," he asked hesitantly afraid of more bad news. All he's had is bad news this week and it seems like it just kept getting worse.

"Dean I'm Dr. Wallace I've been treating Sam." The man now known as Dr. Wallace said as he smiled again.

"Is he ok? What happened? Can I see him?" Dean blurted out discarding the clip board to stand up.

"Whoa ease off the twenty questions there son he's just fine I assure you that. How about we head to my office so I can give you my diagnosis." Dr. Wallace offered kindly as he noticed the victim's family in a distressed state. He too had questions that needed to be answered.

"Alright," Dean slumped his shoulders as all the tension rolled out of him. _Sam was fine. _He never knew how good it was to hear those three words.

"Follow me." A cheery voice called as he followed him down the hallway until they reached a door which stated in bold white letters DR WALLACE.

Following him inside the door as the door was held open he had to duck his head as model airplanes were hanging from the ceiling.

"It's my favorite past time." The doctor offered as Dean took a seat in front of the desk.

"I see that," Dean grumbled as he almost got his head decapitated but a friggin airplane. "So how'd the surgery go? What was it even for?" When can I see Sam?" Dean blurted out again as questions ran through his mind. He jiggled his thigh impatiently when the doctor didn't answer right away.

"Let's start from the beginning shall we." Doctor Wallace offered kindly seeing Dean's mask of impatience. "Sam was brought in over 6 hours ago in a bad state. I rushed him to immediate surgery to repair broken stitches."

6 hours ago? Broken stitches? His fears were confirmed as his anger rose. But 6 hours ago. He just got here. "Is that all?"

"I'm afraid not son. Sam has an infection that attacked not only his side but inside as well." Doctor Wallace said with a bit of pity.

"What do you mean?" Dean said with confusion. His anger was skyrocketing. He specifically told Devin to keep Sam on the I.V do to an infection starting.

"He has pneumonia in one lung luckily we caught it before it can attack the other one. I surmise that's what caused him to bust open the stitches was the coughing it brought." Doctor Wallace stated calmly taking off his glasses to lay them aside.

Lucky ass. Dean muttered. Devin was real lucky that Sam's cough caused him to bust open his stitches cause if he did then he be busting open his head. "He's going to be ok right? You said the surgery went fine."

"Yes it went as well as to be expected. The only problem with pneumonia in the lungs is it produces a deep hacky cough that brings up mucus from the chest sometimes blood. We run a risk if he coughs again he may very well likely bust open his new stitches but I don't see that as a problem as we have him on an oxygen mask." Doctor Wallace stated.

"Oxygen mask? What do you need that for?" Dean asked confused. When he left Sam he was breathing fine albeit he was a bit loopy and out of it but his breathing wasn't compromised or he never would have left. _He never should have left. _Dean closed his eyes briefly as tears began to well.

"His oxygen levels were dangerously low. I know that wasn't caused by the pneumonia that's one question I like to ask Dean." Doctor Wallace said in a stern-full tone reminding him of his father when he gets upset.

"Ask me what?" Dean cringed as his voice squeaked out.

"Those stitches Dean I think you know." Doctor Wallace questioned leaning forward.

Geez was it hot in here? Dean said pulling at his shirt. What was he supposed to say? My brother got attacked by a werewolf. My father is a pompous dick. I stitched him up myself. I let myself be manipulated and persuaded away from him. Now Sam's hurt and its all my fault. So how was you evening? "I don't know what you're talking about mister?"

"Dean I won't call the cops I just want the truth, I want what's best for Sam as do you" Doctor Wallace said gently noticing the sweat forming on his brow.

Dean sighed as he too leaned forward. "You said Sam's ok."

"Yes."

"He's in his own room resting comfortably?"

"Of course."

"Good," Dean said scratching at his stubble. "It all started when Sam was 6 months old…."

* * *

**Sorry Sammy wasn't in this but he will be next chapter. So will john and Bobby. We'll also get to see where Devin has been hiding. Reviews are like chocolate. Thanx Charity**


	11. Chapter 11

**Authors Note:** Here is chapter 11 and you're going to see some Sammy. Devin, John, Bobby, and Dean all wrapped into one present. Let me remind you I suck at medical terms and anything having to do with it but I'll try my best. Please, please, please remember to not take things at face value. It will guarantee your ultimate satisfaction in not only this story but all sorts of fan fiction and other literary pieces. Cheers. Reviews are chocolate. Thanx Charity.

* * *

"….when they brought him home from the hospital I couldn't contain myself. I was acting like a teenage girl on prom night." Dean smiled at the faint memory. Remembering the way he coddled a baby Sammy in his arms. His mother's voice telling him to be gentle and don't get too exited or he'll drop him. He just kept telling his Mom he wouldn't drop Sammy. He would never drop Sammy.

Doctor Wallace smiled at Dean's reminiscence. He too had many wonderful memories with his family being a father and a grandfather. "I can tell you love your brother very much Dean."

"You have no idea." Dean chuckled as he tried to hide his blush. He never really told Sam he loved him. He always depended on Sam understanding that his love runs thicker than words and he can't really describe it.

"I just have to ask Dean where's your parents? I surmise that you are only just a young lad." The doctor asked curiously. He knew his patient was only 18 but Dean didn't look to be much older. So that leaves the question where are the parents in this type of family crisis.

Dean's smile faded as a deep frown formed. What was he going to say? His Dad was an ass and he can't make it to the phone right now. His Mom…

"Dean?"

"Uh…my Mom died in a house fire when I was four it's just been my Dad, my brother and me." Dean stammered as he looked lazily around the room avoiding eye contact. The conversations been lovely but he needs to see his brother.

"I'm sorry to hear that Dean my parents died when I was 18 and I had to take full responsibility of my brother. I knew there was something special about you and your brother when I saw you two. Now I know what it is." The doctor smiled as he leaned forward again.

Dean's attention was grabbed as the doctor relayed his personal information. _The apple doesn't far fall from the tree eh. _"Special huh? Like what?"

"You remind me of myself." The doctor said with a laugh as he took in Dean's 'are you serious look?' look.

"Seriously?" Dean asked with amusement. He wasn't trying to be rude or mean but Doctor Wallace was a little past due. His hair was chalk full of gel to slide it back almost like one of the greasers in grease.

"Yes, you remind me of the way I was with my brother. Belligerent, irrational, un-thinking. I would do anything and everything to keep him safe. Do whatever it takes."

Dean tried to comprehend what the doctor was saying. _Belligerent? Irrational? Un-thinking? _Dean was smart, charming, witty, sexy. Yep that about sums him up. He does agree on doing anything to keep his little brother safe but he's not belligerent whatever the hell that means. He wishes he had his walking encyclopedia to tell him. "Where's this going?"

"What I'm trying to say is, I know the act Dean I've been through it. I sheltered my brother Ian throughout his whole life trying to keep him safe and I learned you just have to let them go." The Doctor said sadly, as tears began to well.

Let them go? What the hell was this doctor saying? This doctor doesn't know him. He doesn't know what's out there. How can he let Sam go out into a world full of monsters? He's not ready to let Sam go, he may never be. Sam's safe right by his side. "What are you trying to say?"

"Son," The doctor said with tears in his eyes. "Let him go when the time comes. If you don't it will only be harder. I know believe me I know. Ian slipped right through my fingers and I lost him." Doctor Wallace said while bending his head as tears escaped.

Dean began to panic. _Let him go. _He can't let him go. He won't let him go. Never. NEVER. Sam can't leave him. It's not safe. It will never be safe. No matter how much of an ass his Dad is there's no place safer than inside the Impala with his Dad and Sammy. "Where is this all coming from?"

"What," Dean gulped as he continued. "If you don't mind me asking happened to Ian?"

The Doctor smiled a sad smile as he explained. "Ian was real sick and I disregarded it as him just complaining of a normal stomach bug. I was 23, Ian was 16, and I went to this party and left him home alone. He was still sick and I just told him to quit complaining. I come home and Ian's in a coma and not responding. I rush him to a hospital and I get the biggest shock of my life. They tell me Ian has cancer." The doctor said while shaking at the long ago memory. "They tell me Ian was too far gone; there was nothing they could do so they pulled the plug. That's how I got into the medical world. I wasn't going to let another family that may be oblivious suffer the same fate as I did." The doctor said with force.

Dean took as steady breath as the doctor's story hit him full force. The doctor was wrong. They were nothing alike. He wouldn't disregard Sam if he was sick or leave him for some run of the mill party. He wouldn't give up on him either. He also wouldn't let him go. He loved Sam and owed him too much to even think about that. "I'm sorry about that, but my brother needs me and I like to go sit with him."

"But of course." The doctor said shaking out of his sob story.

"Thank you by the way. You made me understand a few things." Dean said with a smile while getting up.

"Your welcome. Anytime you need to talk you know where to fine me." Doctor Wallace stated as he sat up himself.

"Will do."

* * *

Devin puffed absently on his cigarette as he leaned against the wall of hospital. After he dropped, Sam off he ran out of sight but stayed within distance of hearing. Words like _infection, pneumonia, low oxygen levels. _Rang through his head and all he could think about was his ass is grassed if Dean or John ever found him. From what he knew, they were still on the hunt and it's still clear.

Taking one last drag from the cigarette he drop it to the ground still lit as he made his way inside. Smiling at the head nurse, he made his way to Sam's room. He made sure he stayed long enough to hear what room Sam would be in. Walking along the hall, he turned a corner and almost pissed his pants as he spotted Dean sitting inside a room with Sam's doctor. "Oh shit!" He whispered clinging to the wall thinking Dean spotted him.

He peered absently inside the room and breathed a sigh of relief, as it seems as if Dean was caught up in a deep conversation.

"Phew," He breathed to himself smiling to the nurses as they gave him odd stares. "I kinda like my ass so I want to keep it that way." He said to himself as he straightened out his leather jacket and moved on. He only had a limited time and he had to be sharp and alert to Dean's footsteps.

Walking a couple more steps, he walked right into the room and was dismayed Sammy wasn't up yet. Of course, he could fix that. Closing the door behind him he made sure it was a loud thud.

He was amused when the body on the bed jerked up as a reaction and the eyes started to move around wildly. "Did ya miss me Sammy?"

* * *

"John are you ok?" Bobby asked his friend in a soft tone but all alarms bells were ringing to beat his ass. How could he of just listened to John? It seems like a lot of people have been regretting that lately.

"No Bobby I'm not. I'm not ok and…" John stopped as he picked himself off the bed. What the hell have I done? I just lost both of my sons. One son just threatened to kill me! The other might already be….No! Sam's not dead he can't be.

"John it's alright you can still fix this." Bobby offered.

"I don't think I can. This is better than feeling sorry for myself." John said quietly as he gathered up his duffle and coat.

"Where are you going?" Bobby asked confused but he already knew the answer.

"I'm going back to Boise to get my sons and fix this fucked up mess." John said turning to his friend for the first time as he gave him an incredulous look.

"What about the hunt?" Bobby asked with a slight smirk. He didn't care about the hunt he just wanted John to admit that the hunt wasn't important when it came to his sons.

"I don't care about the damn hunt! I don't care about the stupid thing that killed Mary! I don't care anymore. All I care about is holed up in a hospital and the other one has a death threat on me. I just want my boys back." John said the last part pleadingly. He really and truly wanted his sons back. Healthy and happy. He didn't care what it took. If they had to stop hunting for awhile then by god they would stop hunting. If Dean waned to take Sammy away for awhile he would let him. If Dean though it was best then he would go with Dean's judgment. He would do anything to get his family back the way it was.

"That's all I wanted to hear. Do you need me anymore John?" Bobby asked seriously with a smile still on his face.

John smiled a bit and was a bit embarrassed to find out he's been played. "Nah go back to south Dakota you ole geezer." John smiled even wider when Bobby grumbled about senior citizen discount.

"Call me John when you get there." Bobby said seriously hanging from the door jam.

"I will and I might need to call you if Dean goes through on my death wish." John chuckled a little but stopped as Bobby's stare hit him. "Not funny huh?"

"Nope now go get your boys you idgit." Bobby said as he left John to go mend his family's broken relationship.

"Thanks," John said to empty air. Once alone John realized he would have to hot-wire a care since Dean took the Impala. Oh, boy the things you do for family. "Don't worry kiddo daddy's coming home for dinner."

* * *

Sam was in a state of bliss. Everywhere was numb from his fingertips to his lips. His side was the most numbed though. His memory was a little fuzzy and he surmises it's from the fantastic painkillers he's been given. The last thing he can remember was being carried bridal style out the front door and his side throbbing like a motherfucker. Hmm note to self pain killers make me curse like a drunken sailor. AWESOME!

He smiled lightly in his drug-induced hazed. He couldn't remember the last time he was put on heavy-duty pain killers because his brother always told the doctor how loopy they made him so the doctor always gave him a low dosage. It would take the pain away but it didn't make him happy like these would. He would forget about hunting, school, fights with dad, trying so hard to be perfect. It just fades away. Life fades away and he wishes every day he could doped up to the gills.

His smile soon faded as a loud bang resounded throughout his room. His eyes shot instantly open ready for action even though he knew he wasn't going to be much of an opponent when he's doped up on happy juice. His body jerked with the movement as he heard a cold steel like voice cut through the happy thoughts in his mind.

"Did ya miss me Sammy?"

That voice. He may be doped up on happy juice but it's hard to forget that voice. Now he knows who carried him out bridal style. Which he plans to blackmail him like forever after he gets out of her for that. He also knows why he's in here to begin which. He also knows how this whole damn mess got started. Devin. He quickly took off the oxygen mask as he laid it around his neck.

Then he turned his head weakly to the side to see Devin's figure approaching the chair. He groaned from displeasure. Why does Devin have to ruin his perfect moment? It's not often he get's shot with this wonderful concoction.

Devin plopped down loudly in the chair as he annoyingly ruffled his hair where it poked it eyeballs. He gave him an evil glare underneath his hair but it only fueled the fire.

"What's crackin Sammy?"

"Why does God hate me?" Sam asked honestly, as he put on his best puppy dog expression. He was feeling so good a minute ago and now he feels like shit.

"Cause you're a lousy ass hunter. I don't know ever try asking him?" Devin said sarcastically. Obviously, Sam doesn't have all his marbles. Even more fun.

Sam looked at Devin in awe. Not from the first statement, because he couldn't give a damn about hoe lousy he was in hunting but the second one. "You're a genius!" Sam exclaimed.

"Well now I have been called that a coupe of times in bed…" Devin said brushing his shoulder.

"Eww…Devin I don't want to hear that." Sam complained bring his hands to his ears. It didn't do much good because he couldn't feels his hands.

"Hey you said it."

"Why'd you come here." Sam asked honestly. While watching the pretty colors on the hospital ceiling.

"I don't know when you're doped up your pretty amusing." Devin grinned as Sam gave him a hurt look.

"Is that all I am too you? Entertainment? Is that why you pushed me out for that werewolf? For your entertainment!" Sam retorted his voice rising. Was that all he was anymore. Entertainment. A puppet on a string to satisfy his dad and brother and any other hunter who came along?

"No you're too boring. I pushed you so you could actually do something for a change. Your lazy, pathetic, and have no experience for what's out there." Devin said his smile turning into a cold frown.

Sam's eyes began to water in his drug-induced state. He was vulnerable and he couldn't hide his emotions in. Was that what people really though about him? Was that what Dean thought? That though struck a cord as he began to hyperventilate.

"Sam?" Devin questioned when Sam didn't respond. He heard the wail of monitors later that told him all he needed to know. Sam was in distress and he caused it. Shit!

* * *

**Oh no with Sam in distress the doctor is sure to respond. Plus Dean and doctor were just leaving last time we saw them. Dun Dun Dun. Will Dean catch Devin at the scene of the crime? Or will Devin make a hasty escape? And will John be accepted by Sam again and will Dean go all badass bounty hunter and kill John. The world may never know? Feedback is appreciated. Thanx Charity**

**P.S more doped up Sam in the future**


	12. Chapter 12

**Authors Note:** Howdy I can't tell you all enough the thanks and gratitude I have for you actually reading this and on top of that reviewing. You guys…*shakes head* I want to give you all hugs but its hard when a computer screen is stopping me. I'm glad were all being patient because this story obviously takes a lot of patience. Don't worry all the things you guys say in your review I take into consideration and I listen too. And please guys hold off the angry mob on Devin. He'll get _his _but just not quite yet *evil grin*. Other than that here's chapter 12. Thanx Charity

* * *

Dean was walking quietly down the hall his mood was actually pleasant, serene. He put on a calm smile as the Doctor looked his way. He didn't know what that Doctor did but he must have amazing healing powers. Dean chuckled to himself.

That's when he heard it a distressed wailing sound. He should have become familiar with the sound haven been in hospitals many times before.

He didn't know why or even what was making him panic. But he panicked. The sounds of a heart monitor could have come from anywhere. I mean they were in a friggin hospital for god sakes.

A cold hand gripped his heart in a strangled panic and he actually stopped breathing.

When he watched the Doctor bolt to a certain room he followed without conviction. He knew it. He just knew it was Sam. Damnit! I should have been there instead of telling pity party stories.

He skidded into the doorway and all the air left his lungs. It was indeed Sam. His brother was struggling to breathe. Which he shouldn't because he had a fucking oxygen mask at his use. "What the hell is going on here?" Dean asked angrily. Had he been lied too? Did Sam not get the help he needed?

"It's ok Sam just got himself worked up over something. For some reason his oxygen mask is off." The Doctor said with a bit of conviction in his tone. "There weren't any rounds in this hall." He noted.

Dean looked around the room suspiciously after the Doctors last statement. There was a chair pulled up towards Sam's bed but it looked to be knocked over. _Someone was trying to get away in a hurry. _His eyes tightened as he looked for some other clue as who could have been in here with his brother. A soft breeze came into the room chilling him. He wasn't really sure it was the wind.

He walked over to the window and looked it over. It was wide open, the curtains blowing softly in the wind. He looked out the window and noticed soft grass down below. Even if it was quite a ways up it wouldn't do much damage to someone jumping out. Someone who's skinny enough to fit through the window. Someone who had experience with quick getaways. Someone who he really wants to gauge his eyes out. Devin.

His fists tightened as he clenched his jaw. "Damnit!" He exclaimed. Devin snuck right past him. He was right under his nose and all he'd been doing was chatting up the Doctor tossing back stories. Oh god what kinda brother am I?

"Dean?" The Doctor asked hesitantly.

"What?" Dean said with venom spinning fast on his heels almost knocking himself over in the process.

The Doctor cringed back as he took a tentative step backwards. "Uh…Sam is calmed down now. I gave him something to calm him. As long as you keep him calm and content we won't be seeing another episode like that." Doctor Wallace stammered out.

Dean's features lifted as his anger dissipated. He didn't have time for thinking of cruel slow ways of Devin's death. No, he already screwed up too many times. His main and only focus is Sam. Devin could wait and if he wanted to show his skinny white ass again well he'll be waiting. With pleasure. "Thank you." He breathed out as he walked back to the overturned chair.

"Your welcome. If you need anything else please just press the call button." The Doctor said with a slight smile walking out the door.

Hearing the soft click of the door Dean dragged a tired hand over his haggard features. He sighed as he leaned forward to where his elbows rested on Sam's bed. He took one good look at his sibling and he really just wanted to cry. The oxygen mask was back in place as Sam's calm breath ghosted the inside. He didn't even want to see the side wound. He didn't think he could stomach it.

"Sammy." He questioned even though he knew his sibling was out for the count. "I know I haven't been a good big brother lately. Or Dad hasn't been a good father lately. Hell none of us has been any good to you lately." Dean sighed as he reached his hand through the bed railing to grasp Sam's limp cool hand. "I'm sorry, we all our. We haven't been doing our best; we haven't been listening to your needs. I'm ready to listen and I'm sure Dad is. We both our." Why was this so hard? The Doctors words still rang in his ears_. Let him go. _Dean leaned closer as he whispered into his sibling's ear. "I'm ready for you to tell me that big secret man. I'm sure Dad would like to know too." Dean smiled as he included his father. His father was an ass, stupid, sometimes driven to insanity. He still was there father.

No matter how angry or how outraged he gets he can't cut Dad out of his life. It's him, Sam, and his Dad to the end. Kicking ass and taking names and he wouldn't have it any other way.

He leaned back in the chair as he released Sam's hand. "If this big secret is you telling me you knocked some girl up I'm going to murderize you. Of course after I give you a big hug rico suave." Dean smiled even though he knew that was far, far, far from the truth.

"Whenever you come back to the land of the living I'll be here. I promise." He whispered silently trying to get comfortable in the plastic chair.

* * *

Devin limped back to the parking lot as he grumbled profanities. Damn window. Damn so not soft grass. Damn flailing limbs. "Damnit all to hell!" He muttered as he limped his way into a corner so he could sit and rest. His ankle was just twisted but at the moment he needed a quick getaway and without the use of an ankle he's screwed.

The slow throb of his ankle reminded him of his past childhood. In a way. How fucking messed up is that when a hurt ankle reminds you of your child hood?

_He's running. Trying his best but at the moment his ankle is protesting. All he wants to do is sit down and cry and make the world go away. He knows that's not possible. _

_His Dad will find him somehow. He always does. Trying to run from his father was the stupidest mistake he ever made. _

"_DEVIN!"_

_He's trying to trudge through the forest but sticks, twigs and unseen attackers keep making it harder. _

_When he tripped unexpectedly. He knew this was the end. It was over. _

"_You runnin from me boy?"_

_He swallowed not wanting to answer. Not wanting to say the wrong thing. _

_The hit came fast. It knocked him to his side as it sent a cry though the dense forest. _

"_You were always worthless. Always amounted to nothing. When I found that damn gun in your room I knew what you wanted to do with it!"_

_Devin knew different. His Dad may have him by the reigns but he gets around and he's been talking. Seems as if fairytales aren't as fake as they once were. _

"_You were trying to kill me! Off your own Dad."_

_That was a good idea but no he wasn't. _

"_I'll show you, you good for nothing punk." _

_His Dad leveled his shotgun and prepared to fire. Devin knew this was do or die. He didn't want to do this. Didn't think it would come to this. Launching himself at his father he unwound the small knife he hidden in his hand. He viciously slashed his father's throat as he watched with almost glee as his father choked up blood. _

"_Who's worthless again?" He said still limping as his fathers body went down for the last time. Not just for his drunken sleep for the night. It was over. _

_He wiped the blood off on his shirt as he turned around and never looked back again. _

Devin shivered at the memory. After that he was all alone in the world being a young 13 years old. He got by, by hitchhiking or walking. To whatever destination he could. He met John when he was 15 and John took him under his wing. Nurtured him like a hunter would and he envied Dean and Sam for having such a great father.

Most of all he envied Sam. The kid had it all. Looks, brains, hunting skills. He just didn't embrace the hunting lifestyle. It angered him to no end. The hunting lifestyle gave him an exit out of his hell. Sam seems to think _this_ is hell.

The kid had a great life and he wished John would just ditch the kid and take him instead, he wouldn't argue with his every word, he wouldn't complain. He was loyal, honest, a companionable hunter and friend even son if you think about it.

He huddled in closer to the wall as a clod breeze blew by. He would just have to get back up there and make Sam understand.

* * *

John pulled in to St. Luke's with a squeal, well as much of a squeal as a station wagon can produce. He didn't bother locking up or checking for anything. He ran up to the hospital doors as they opened for him automatically.

Running up to the head desk. He said in a breathless voice, "my son Sam Winchester. What room is he in?" He asked in a flurry of words. He wasn't even gonna give precedence that Sam isn't ok. Sam has to be especially if Dean is here with him.

The nurse smiled at him but he didn't have time to return the smile or did he even want to. "So you must be the father?"

His mouth fell open a little at that. Was Dean telling everyone what a horrible father he was? "Yes I am, please I need to see him." He said in a begging tone that he loathes.

"Of course Mr. Winchester he's in room 327 down the hall there." She said with a warm smile pointing to a hallway that's was near the back. That's all he needed to know.

"Thanks," He mumbled off as he made his way to room 327.

When his eyes hit room 327 he had to calm his breathing. He didn't know what Dean's reaction would be or if Sam was actually ok.

He breathed a steady breath as he pushed the door open a crack to take a peek inside. What he saw made his heart ache.

* * *

**You've seen a little smidget of Devin's life is there any sympathy? Guess not. **

**I left it off there because I wanted to keep you guessing of will Dean just let John come back willingly. What scene caused John's heart to ache? What are we ever going to do with the trouble, bi-polar, limping Devin? The world may never know. Feedback is appreciated. Thanx charity**


	13. Chapter 13

**Authors note:** Did anyone like seeing a glimpse into Devin's life? Figure we have to give his side of the story too. If so just tell me then more glorious moments for his so wonderful childhood and up will be written. This story is coming to a closer soon and I promised Devin would get what's coming to him we just have to be patient and see what unique way I choose. Thanx Charity

* * *

John stood inside the doorframe silently as he watched both sons sleep. Sam was lying still on the bed his face relatively calm. While Dean obviously took down the bedrail to curl up on the bed. Both elbows bundled underneath to support his head.

It made all his insides fall apart at how vulnerable both looked. He didn't care if Sam hated him for the rest of his life. He didn't care if Dean wanted to kill him. If this was the last glimpse he got of both his sons then it was worth it.

He walked silently into the room not wanting to wake neither one of them from there peaceful slumber but he hadn't even made it two steps when Dean's head bobbed instantly up and his body stiffened.

John froze too not knowing what to do. He cleared his throat as he began. "Dean its Dad and…I wasn't there before but I'm here now."

* * *

Devin was wet.

It started to fucking rain on him. _Wonderful. _Like this shitty day couldn't get any shittier. Trying to get as much protection from the rain as possible he huddled close to the wall which of course wasn't doing much. He couldn't even smoke the rest of his cigarettes. To top it all off John had to come barreling through and scare the living hell out of him.

Thanks John.

He must have looked like a hobo because John didn't give him a second glance he charged on. Just another person stopping him from seeing Sam again. Fantastic. His life is the greatest.

Sam had to ruin everything. John was his friend. Dean was his friend. John was like the father he never had. Dean was like the brother he never had. Yet every time he would come over there the attention would always be on one person. Sam. Yet Sam would blow it off like it was nothing. He would completely disregard the love and affection he gets like it's worth nothing.

Devin would never do that. Devin deserves that love and affection _more than _Sam. He tried to teach Sam, show Sam the error of his ways. Show him what a great life he has, what a great family he has. Even though Sam may not be that good at it he tried to lend a hand tried to help out but Sam wanted to be a whiny brat and run to older brother when he got a boo boo.

_Which thanks by the way I had to wear that fucking nose brace for like a month!_

John even helped him out to buy him what he needs. His Dad never did that. His Dad called him a freak called him stupid, worthless, weird. John called him special, a genius, even charming when he wants to be. So when he asked the small favor of getting him his pills John never questioned him. Never even asked what they were for.

Now it's all down the drain and he hasn't had one in over a week.

All because of Sam.

He could have been John's son. He could have had it all! It could have been him.

All because of Sam.

Devin started too huddled closer to the wall as he pulled his jacket tighter. He knows what he needs to do. He made the choice when he was 13 he could do it now. He just had to get some things. Then he will have it all like he's always wanted. He could finally be happy.

* * *

Dean was tired. Tired of his father. Tired of Doctors trying to get into his business. Tired of whack-job hunters hurting his brother. Just tired of it all. Most of all he was just plain tired. Not having gotten much sleep in the past week or week before that it was no wonder he crashed. Thank god he remembered to lower the bed rail or he be sporting one hell of a bruise.

He slept peacefully knowing Sam's ok even though he may not be mentally he could fix that. He always could. He wasn't losing Sam.

That's when the hairs started to prickle on the back of his neck. They always did when he felt someone come in. Not wanting to scare off a nurse or a doctor he acted like he was still sleeping.

He heard the door get pushed open a crack then…nothing. He waited for someone to make there announcement or come fiddle with Sam's monitors…nothing.

He was being watched.

He still feigned like he was asleep figuring he could catch whoever this was by surprise. Once the figure took two steps he bolted up and stiffened his body in response for an attack.

"Dean its Dad and…I wasn't there before but I'm here now."

All the air just left his lungs at that very moment. How the hell did he get here? Why was he here? _You know why he's here it's his son dumbass. _You can't let him off the hook; look what he did to Sam. Look at what he's done to Sam.

"Leave." Dean growled low in his throat not wanting to disturb or wake up Sam.

"Dean you have every right to be mad at me and I'll promise I'll leave after I talk to you and Sam." John begged as he walked forward.

Sounded plausible. A win-win situation. "Just get it over with," Dean said with a sigh. "and don't you dare say anything to hurt Sammy." Dean said the last part with venom not wanting his already fragile brother to become even more broken.

"Dean I never wanted to hurt Sammy, nor you. I was just trying to do what I thought was best." John sighed out as he dragged an extra chair over to Sam's bedside to sit down in.

Dean almost laughed at the statement. "You obviously weren't trying hard enough."

"Yeah, I know I just wanted so hard for the hunt and you boys to mix I realized I've been wrong all along."

"You just realized that now?" Dean asked incredulously.

"Yeah actually I did. Dad's a little slow on the intake of things as he gets older." John chuckled but stopped as Dean's cold glare never softened. "What I'm trying to say is screw the hunt, screw it all. You boys are more important than the hunt will ever be. It just took a werewolf and Devin too realize that."

Dean's eye's softened at his father's conviction. He never once heard his father utter those words. Had his father made a breakthrough? Or was this another trick? Wait a minute werewolf _and_ Devin? "Dad is there some things you haven't been telling me? Because if you want to come back into me and Sammy's life you're starting off pretty lousy."

"Dean…there are some things you don't know about the hunt with that werewolf." John stuttered out slowly as he focused his eyes on Sam.

Great his father gives him a mind blowing confession and a lie. Great Job to half-ass it Dad. But isn't that just like dear ole' Dad. "Well spit it out."

"That werewolf wasn't the only person at fault that hurt Sam."

Dean's face tightened at the mention that his Dad kept something this important from him. He knows everything that goes on with his brother. He deserved to know at least how he got hurt. "Then what happened?"

"The werewolf attacked Sam yes, but that was after Devin pushed Sam out to it first." John cringed as Dean's face grew a freighting shade of red.

Dean was running thin on patience. He wanted to give his father a chance. He did. Then his Dad tells him this? His Dad willingly let this guy look after Sam even though he knew he hurt him voluntarily! He rose to his full height as he was about to give his father holy hell when he was interrupted.

"Gentlemen am I disrupting something?" Doctor Wallace asked gently slipping into the room with ease.

Dean stopped as he turned to see the Doctor coming in. He simmered his rage and gave his father a looked stating _'this isn't over'. _"No, please come in." Dean said with a strained smile.

"Thank you. I see we have a new guest." Doctor Wallace noted cheerfully.

"Yeah, this is our Dad." Dean said while thumbing behind him to let his Dad do whatever introductions he wanted.

"John Winchester." John stated thanking heaven that the Doctor interrupted the blowout that was about to happen.

"Pleasure. I came to give you good news." The Doctor stated carrying something concealed in a plastic bag.

"What is it?" Dean asked excitedly. As his grumpy mood turned into a cheerful one he saw his Dad do the same.

"Sam no longer needs the oxygen mask and I'm happy to give him a nasal cannula." The Doctor stated while un-strapping the mask from Sam's face and ripping the bag open.

"That's good right?" John asked while watching the doctor insert the cannula into Sam's nose.

"Very good. It means Sam can breathe just fine through his mouth. Also I'm very happy to announce the infection seems to be dissipating Sam should be waking up soon." The Doctor said with a smile as both patients eyes lit up.

"Really." Dean said with a bright smile. Sammy was coming back to him. Even though there family was in shambles right now Sam was coming back.

"Yes, though I must warn you Sam's on heavy duty pain killers for the pain in his side. I don't know how he's affected by them so he might be quite out of it." Doctor Wallace knows from the past that patients all react differently whether there happy, sad or violent.

Dean smiled at that knowing full well how loopy Sam is on pain killers. Sam would be a riot when he woke up. It would also be easier to get that little secret out of him. "Thanks for the info."

"Yes, thank you Doctor." John spoke up as the Doctor was leaving.

"No problem you know where to find me." Doctor Wallace smiled as he waved goodbye slipping out of the room.

Dean's earlier mood seemed to melt away. He didn't feel any anger or fury anymore. What was in the past was in the past. Though it would be a very long time before there Dad was making any critical decisions concerning Sam. He had to let things go or they would never move on. "Dad I'm sorry, now I may never forgive you for that stunt can we just enjoy what we have and watch Sam in his doped up state." Dean said with a smile watching as his fathers frown turned into a smile as well.

"I'm sorry Dean for everything and I understand if you never want to forgive me. I agree let's enjoy what we have because aren't we the luckiest people in the world?" John said looking down at a sleeping Sam.

"Yeah the luckiest." Dean said softly as he gently ran his hands through Sam's hair.

* * *

**Now you know why Devin has altering mood swings. You also know what his end game is. Dean decided to let John back in on certain conditions. We all know Dean tries his best to keep his family together and that's what he's doing. Who wants some dopey Sam next chapter? I know I do. Also the nding was smoopy but the next chappy is a little intense so I figure I'll give you some smoop. Feedback is appreciated. Thanx Charity**


	14. Chapter 14

**Authors Note:** The story is winding down soon and I know a lot of you are waiting on Devin's demise (I might have to keep you waiting muwahaha) Am I that evil? I think not. Anywho we get some dopey Sammy this chapter and some more of psychotic Devin is that a bad mix? I also think not. Enjoy. Thanx Charity.

* * *

Devin's anxiety is rising. He's knows what's happening. He's relapsing.

He's supposed to take his medication everyday. He would have no questions asked. Except it would have been easier if there would have been medication to take. It always would have been easier. Life could always get easier.

Why is he even huddled against a wall? He doesn't deserve to be huddled against a wall like some homeless bum. He's better than that.

Devin McAdams is a better man than that. His father taught him to never let a person know his weakness. Right now the whole fucking world knows.

It would be so easy, so simple. One simple move. One quick move. Just how he executed his father many moons ago. He still has the blade from that cold day.

He still carries it around as a souvenir.

Now what's a treasured piece of history would have even more value added to it. Getting up off the cold cement ground. Devin's stood on shaky limbs as he reached around in his jacket. Finding what he was looking for he smiled.

"Sammy boy's got a new visitor."

* * *

The noises swished and collided into a symphony of awesomeness. All garbled and mingled to wear his mind couldn't comprehend but at the moment his mind really couldn't care. The colors doing a dance behind his lids were keeping him company for the moment anyway. He smiled as they danced and danced not daring to stop.

_"-ammy?"_

Who was interrupting the show? He didn't want any ham? His smile turned into a pout as a shadow loomed over the colors effectively scaring them off. "Please don't go?" He whined silently wanting them to come back. A single tear slipped from his face at there absence.

"I'm not going anywhere Sammy." Dean cooed softly noticing now that his brother was crying. He looked at his Dad and his Dad gave him a look of understanding.

"I'll go get some coffee or something. You want anything?" John asked as he sat up.

Dean just gave him an incredulous look and shooed him off.

He looked to Sam again a bit worried at the burst of emotions.

Sam was sad at the loss of colors and he was a bit frightened at the new appearance of darkness. He didn't like darkness. It would be better to just open his eyes to light then stare at the dark. He quickly opened his eyes but not to be met with light but a very concerned older brother. "Dean!" He stated cheerfully.

Dean's concern dissipated as he took in the full giddiness of his brother's face. "The one and only. How are you feeling?" He asked seriously with a smile on his face.

"I'm awesome but why did the mean shadow chase away the colors?" Sam asked as his lower lip quivered.

"Colors?" Dean asked perplexed. Right? Doped up brother. "I don't know but I'll put the shadow on my hit list."

"Good, what are you doing here?"

That question hit right to the gut. Sam didn't expect him back for a week and obviously remembered his speech about the hunt. "Uh…Sammy I got a call about you being in the hospital I came as soon as I could."

"Oh, why am I here?" Sam asked confused. He didn't feel any pain.

What was he supposed to say? I failed so badly. Dad failed you, I failed you. We both let you down. "That werewolf remember? The wound it got infected." Dean said leaving out the part with Devin.

Sam's mind quickly figured out what happened. He remembered the conversation he had the other day with Devin but after that it was a blur. "Yeah I remember." Sam swallowed nervously doing a quick eye search of the room. All of the sudden he wasn't so happy.

"You ok? Your not gonna get sick on me are you?" Dean asked concerned with how fast Sam's face changed colors.

"No, just where's Dad?" Maybe his Dad still had some sympathy for him.

"He's here Sammy. I promise you he won't get the chance to make another dumbass plan again." Dean grit his teeth together even thinking about it.

Sam just nodded his understanding knowing what Dean was talking about. He shifted in the bed as he stared up at the ceiling not finding it as amusing as he did the other day.

"What's wrong huh? You're always so happy when you're doped to the gills." Dean didn't like this new attitude that Sam was sporting. Sam's doped up on some happy juice and now Sam's depressed.

Sam turned to face Dean and just stared. His mind caught his brother's eyes and he couldn't look away.

"What are you staring at? Something you like?" Dean was feeling uneasy about the stare down he was getting. He was actually starting to blush.

"Dean," Sam said in awe. "When did your eyes get so green? There so pretty." Sam was just losing himself in his brothers green orbs. Why didn't he notice how bright and vibrant they were?

Dean's eyebrows widened at that statement. Coming from a chick that's highly flattering from your brother that's sort of creepy but none the less admiring. "Pretty? Could you be any more gay?" Dean chuckled as Sam continued to stare on. He would let him as long as Sam was happy.

* * *

John shuffled to find a vending machine so he could give Dean some privacy with Sam. He was willing to do anything Dean said at the moment and is Dean asked him to dress as a hooker and stroll around this parking lot by god he do it.

He was awkwardly walking in a daze when he collided with someone.

"Oomph." He exclaimed knocking whoever it was down. He shook his head to clear the cobwebs as he went to help whoever it was up then he froze.

"Devin?" He asked in a cold icy tone.

"Long time no see Johnny boy." Devin said in a panicky voice. He hurriedly got up and pulled out his knife pressing it into the soft belly of the older Winchester.

John froze not knowing what to do. He felt the knife press into his stomach not doing any harm but as a warning. He looked to see if anyone saw but everyone seemed unfazed. _Damn sneaky bastard._

Devin leaned closer as he whispered. "Now you're going to get Dean out of that room and get me a one way ticket in Sam's room."

"If I refuse." John said stubbornly. He wouldn't let him hurt his son again.

"It's Dean or Sam Johnny Boy pick your poison." Devin grinned as a look of horror washed across John's face. _Bingo._

* * *

**Sorry this chapter was so short but I needed to break it up. **

**Oh no Devin is full on loony and he's a man on a mission. Sam is dopey and clueless and John has to make a decision. Feedback is appreciated. Thanx Charity**


	15. Chapter 15

**Authors Note: **So we left off at a very tense moment with John having to make a choice or come up with another plan which we know how well that's worked out in the past. What will John do? What will Devin do? We will find out. Hope your still sticking with me on this and as I promised Devin will get his well respected ass beating even in his downed state. It will be an enjoyable one I promise have I let you down? Better yet don't answer that I don't want to know if I did lol. Hope your still enjoying this. Thanx Charity.

* * *

Dean was beginning to feel uneasy. Even though a doped up Sam was amusing him with the hilarity of his random ass questions and constant laughter out of thin air it wasn't Sam he was feeling uneasy about. The Doctor had already came in and said Sam could breathe fine on his own taking the nasal cannula away which for some odd reason Sam cried but never mind that it was his Dad he was concerned about.

No matter how bad his Dad may seem or how mad he is at him he never would wish bodily harm to him or death. Never.

His Dad should have been back by now. A five to ten minute coffee run doesn't take an hour. With the threat of Devin still lurking around he's a little on edge. He knows without a doubt that his Dad could kick Devin's ass any day of the week but he knows something else too.

Devin wasn't normal.

Well in the sense that he has reoccurring mood swings like a girl than yeah he wasn't normal. His Dad once told him that Devin just had a disability. That he was helping Devin out by getting his medication to take to keep him what he calls sane. From the looks of things Devin isn't sane anymore.

He's had a talk with Sam about it and Sam so mildly described in his geeky way that Devin must be bi-polar. Gosh his brother was a geek sometimes. How the hell does he know these terms? Honestly.

With Sam fascinated at the ceiling and his Dad no where to be found. Dean was on edge and he bent down to feel for the knife he kept in his boot. He was never unarmed a lesson his Dad instilled into his brain at a young age.

No matter where you are don't be unarmed.

With a doped up Sam, a missing father and a pmsing psycho on the loose this was sure to be one hell of a ride.

* * *

John could feel Devin's hot breath ghost his neck and it made him tingle with anticipation. He had to come up with something. _Sam or Dean? _No neither. He wasn't handing over his sons like they were prizes. They weren't things that you pass around.

_Come on John think damnit! _The knife was poked harder and he winced when he felt warm liquid start to slide down his belly.

"What's it gonna be Johnny?" Devin whispered a malicious gleam in his eye.

John didn't know. He would willingly give his own life before he let Devin hurt one of his boys again. He already made that mistake once no twice. _Damn was I that horrible? _Suddenly a light bulb lit up in his head. John may have been reckless, stupid, foolish ok, ok enough self bashing but Dean wasn't. Dean was smart, cunning and always remembered orders.

His son was always armed. Even in a time of panic and fear Dean didn't leave without some form of protection on him whether it be a silly knife or he managed to slip a handgun in here. He had no doubt Dean was armed and dangerous. He smiled as pride shone in his eyes.

"What's there to smile about?" Devin sneered. A bit worried that he lost control. He was shaking now and the knife was wobbling. Would he get caught? Would someone see him? It didn't seem likely as this hospital was a small town one. Not really heavily secured but his splitting mind was giving him the cons instead of the pros.

"Follow me I'll lead you to Sam's room." John smiled a cocky smile sure that this plan would work. He could tell Devin was falling apart at the seams and over-confident his son was already suspicious of his absence.

Devin's eyes lit up with a happy gleam. I did it. I won. "That's what I thought. Now turn around and lead." Devin lifted the knife enough so John had time to turn around. Once John fully tuned he shoved the knife back up to his back and pressed it down showing his authority and walked as he did.

John just smiled as he began walking. This would work. All his other plans have failed but he finally realized all along all he had to do was have faith in his sons for a plan to work.

* * *

"Deeeaaan." Sam whined again as the purple unicorn danced on the ceiling. I wonder why every thing danced. Did things like to dance? Why was the unicorn purple?

Dean was shocked out of his tension as he focused on his brothers glazed over eyes. "What Sammy?" He really wished Sam was asleep or something but that left Sam vulnerable. He never liked Sam vulnerable if he could help it. He shook the thoughts out of his head as he kept one eye on the door and the other on his brother.

"Do you like purple unicorns?" Sam asked earnestly as he peered up from his shaggy hair. Boy did he need a haircut.

Dean pried his other eye from the door for the moment at that question. "Purple unicorns? Where'd that come from?" Dean asked with an amused smile. All his tension melted a little at his brother's random questions. Of course he still held the knife close to his hand as it rested on his lap if Devin decided to show up again. _Come on Dad where are you? _

"Don't you see it on the ceiling? It's dancing for me." Sam's eyes sparkled at the display as he made a show of pointing it out to his disbelieving brother.

Dean pretended to look as he peered at the blank white tiled ceiling. He put on an awe-struck face as he gasped. "Wow what a sight." He said with twinkling eyes. He looked to see if his brother believed he saw it and smiled a little when Sam just continued to stare at the ceiling.

"I know isn't it?" Sam said with awe. It wasn't often you see a unicorn break dancing. He would treasure this. Well that is if he could remember is after he's not doped to the gills.

Dean cleared his throat a little wanting to be more serious. The night they were hunting the werewolf still bothered him. Sam still had a lingering secret that he needed to tell and wasn't it great that he had a doped up Sam right here to ask. "So um…Sam do you remember our little conversation when we hunted that werewolf about you having something to tell me." Dean said with seriousness as Sam turned his head.

Sam momentarily broke eye contact with the break dancing unicorn as he took in Dean's words. Conversation? He remembered most of that night but parts were still hazy. The most of what he remembered was Devin pushing him and his Dad yelling at him. _Oh gee those are happy memories. _Devin. Devin was here and Devin made him sick. Well sicker. Dean should know. Dean should know the truth. But Devin was just trying to help or at least that's what he said. God why do I have to be drugged? Nothing makes sense.

"Sammy you ok?" Dean asked concerned as he placed his free hand on Sam's shoulder. Sam was staring into space and to his knowledge not at the purple unicorn.

"Yeah," Sam replied shakily. "I'm good. Could you refresh my memory I don't remember what I said." Sam just wanted a memory boost and maybe he might remember what he actually said to Dean. And hope it wasn't something he'll regret.

Dean swallowed the large lump that positioned itself in his throat. He didn't actually want to relive that conversation. His brother sounded so broken and so worn out it scared him. He didn't want to lose Sam and after the conversation with the Doctor he was plain terrified._ Just let him go? _How could he? How could he let Sam go? It was hard enough watching Sam go to school and not being able to go with him. Or when Sam wanted to hang out with the few friends he made and Dean couldn't go with him. Or when his Dad sent Sam on his first solo hunt although he and his father were sitting close by it wasn't the same as being right next to Sam making sure nothing happened to him.

Now he knows why Mother's cry when there children leave to college. Dean felt like a fucking Mom and wasn't that all wrong.

"You said…." Dean drawled off as he tried to word this in a way that wouldn't tip Sam off that he was panicking about Sam's specific words. "You said you were tired of it all and you just wanted out that ringing any bells?" Dean asked as Sam's eyes grew wide with recognition.

At first Sam was confused with Dean's behavior. What the hell did he say this time? Then the words came back to slap him in the face. "_I'm tired of it all Dean I just want out." _He remembered being just tired after getting another mouthful from his father and just wanting _out. _He could picture Dean's face that night as concern was etched in his otherwise handsome features. He told Dean he would tell him after the hunt and what better time to tell him then when after wards you won't remember.

"Dean," Sam breathed out as he thought of a way to word this without getting yelled at or getting the third degree. "I wasn't lying when I said I was tired or wanted out."

Dean's heart completely shattered at that one statement. How long had Sam been going on like this? "Why didn't you tell me you needed a break? We could have taken time off-"Dean stopped when he saw tears running down Sam's eyes.

"Dean," Sam hiccupped as he tried to control the tears that fell. He had to just get it out or he would never say it. "Dean I got accepted into Stanford." Sam blurted out in a rush of words and sobs. He quickly cringed back scared of the reaction.

Dean was stock silent. He didn't know what to say. His baby brother got accepted into Stanford. _Just let him go. _

Sam took Dean's silence for condemnation and he continued on. "I'm sorry I should have never applied but I got a full ride and when I got that letter and opened it I was so…happy but I remembered you, Dad, the hunt. I couldn't leave you two so I pushed it aside and decided not to go. Then I was getting mixed emotions if that was the right decision. I'm sorry." Sam closed his eyes as he whispered 'I'm sorry.' He suddenly wasn't feeling so dopey anymore.

He got a _full ride _to Stanford. His Sammy. _Just let him go. _"Sammy-" Dean started but stopped as someone burst into the room.

He looked behind his shoulder as his Dad rode a cocky smile as he rolled his eyes behind him. Dean hardened his eyes as he followed his Dad's eye movements.

"Devin." Dean whispered in a cold voice. Giving Sam a consoling pat and a look that will finish this later he smiled as he fingered his hidden weapon. _Go time. _

* * *

**Purple Unicorns? Stanford? Finally Devin getting his ass kicked. Whoa. I was actually pleased with this chapter more so than others. I hope you are too. Feedback is appreciated. Thanx Charity**


	16. Chapter 16

**Authors Note:** It has been brought to my attention through a review about sort of the uneasiness of Devin's bi-polar disability. I wanted to make this clear that I have absolutely **NO** problem with people with disabilities and I wasn't doing this to make fun of any one or poke fun of people with bi-polar disease. I worked with a young girl who was bi-polar so I know the disease. So it's not like I'm clueless. I've worked with many children who have diseases and disabilities so I am in no way making fun or am I prejudice against someone with a disability. It was just to help with the characterization of his character. If he started having mood swings like a girl then you would start assuming he's crazy or secretly a woman so I had this in mind way before I ever posted. Again I'm sorry if this offends but it wasn't my initial purpose. I still hope you can enjoy the story. Thanx Charity

* * *

John smiled as Dean was alert and ready to the threat. _That's my boy. _He could see a teary eyed Sammy looking over as well and he was quite curious as to the reason he was crying but there's no room for discussions when he has a knife poking him in the back.

He knew that Devin probably didn't hear the cold harsh whisper of his name. Or a matter of fact he probably couldn't even see into the room right now. Devin may be tall but he pales in comparison.

John just continued on into the room as he led Devin in. He heard the door shut and he knew that was his cue

He graciously stepped away and unveiled to Devin what lied await. He smiled as Devin's mouth dropped open to hit the floor.

"Surprise." He whispered as John threw a punch at Devin's already crooked nose.

* * *

Dean gripped the handle of the knife until his hand was numb waiting and watching for his fathers move. Waiting for the go ahead. He knew Sam was curious and Sam wanted answers. Well he wanted answers too. He didn't want to know _why_ Sam applied for Stanford he just wanted to know _why_ he didn't tell him.

He could never express in words how tremendously proud he is of his baby brother. How every day he beams with pride at all the little things Sam does. His Dad may never see the way Sam functions or grows but he's seen it since Sam was 6 months old and he couldn't be any more proud.

_Gosh now Sammy's going to get me to cry before I go all Chuck Norris on his Ass. Only for Sammy. _

He quickly blinked away thoughts of Sam and Stanford as his Dad stepped out of the way to reveal Devin's shocked frame. _Wasn't expecting this one bitch? _

He figured this was the go ahead so he was about to unleash all holy hell on his skinny white ass until to his surprise he heard his Dad speak up. _Don't tell me Dad's going to stop me? _

"Surprise." He turned surprised himself as he heard bone connecting with more bone and the terrified shriek of Devin.

"Damn Dad I think you broke his nose again," Dean spoke up as he walked closer to Devin's huddled form. He tucked his knife safely back as he saw Devin's weapon get pushed across the room. "I wanted to do that." Dean muttered.

"Your right I think I did." John admitted looking at the hunched over figure currently holding his bleeding nose.

"Ya think you little shits!" Devin squealed even though it all sounded nasally and was muddled with pain.

Dean cracked his neck as he looked at his Dad a smile on his face. "Dad?" He asked in a wanting tone.

"All yours." John said happily as he stepped aside happy to finally be getting along with his son even if there reunion was beating the shit out of Devin.

* * *

Sam was watching confused as the door banged opened. He jumped slightly at the loud noise thinking it was his father he quickly sucked all his tears away or at least he tried.

He looked to Dean for an answer but he just gave him a quick pat and a look. A look that said _we are so talking about this later_. Sam groaned at the thought. How much more could he say? Dean's silence was enough he already hated him for what he's done. He betrayed the family by that one move.

He looked back at the ceiling hoping to take his mind off the thought but was dismayed; his purple unicorn was gone. _Hmmm maybe the drugs are wearing off? _The only other focus was the commotion in front of him. Sighing Sam just turned as best as he could so he could at least see what the hell was going on.

He at least was correct in his theory. His Dad was the reason for the noise. Except his Dad was just too…calm? His Dad was never this relaxed or giddy. It was almost like his Dad was excited over something and he was pretty sure it wasn't to come see him.

He scrunched his eyebrows. _Something's wrong. _He tried to lift himself off the bed but it only resulted in pain to dance across his side. Ok definitely no more drugs then. He looked from Dean to his Dad trying to convey what was happening. That's when he heard Dean whisper.

It was a small sound to catch his years of hunting and striving to withstand his brother's pranks throughout nighttime has allowed him to become quite sensitive in the hearing compartment. "Devin."

Devin was here? He couldn't see him. He couldn't see much of anything but his fathers face when he twisted in the bed and his brother's backside which eww gross. He was staring to become panicky and nervous. He didn't want to ever see Devin again.

He just has to trust his Dad and Dean.

He quickly closed his eyes wiling the nightmare to be over and wishing his break dancing unicorn to come back.

He never once opened his eyes. Not even when he heard his Dad and Dean carry on a conversation or when he started to hear the makings of a fight. Nope. It would all be over soon.

He didn't even open his eyes when a hand settled on his shoulder.

"Go to sleep Sammy."

The voice whispered. It may not have been his brother's voice but he knew it enough to know that he could trust it. Dad. So he just did as he was told he fell asleep.

* * *

Dean features settled into a casual smirk as Devin looked up through his hands.

"Listen Dean I can explain!" Devin yelled trying to talk through his hands and broken nose.

"Explain what? That you're crazy I already knew that." Dean cracked his knuckles as he advanced.

"Nonononono! Listen I had a plan Dean. A plan." Devin needed to make Dean understand. They could have been a family.

"What plan you prick! The only plan I see is me bashing your skull in." Dean growled. He had enough of talk. All he's got out of this guy was talk. Talk about hunting, talk about girls, talk about everything but he never could put his money where his mouth was.

Maybe he should break his jaw so he could permanently shut him up?

"No-!" But Devin didn't get enough time as a right hook hit his jaw effectively shutting him up.

"That's what I though you said!" Dean sneered. When Devin didn't fall he hit him with a left hook and was rewarded when Devin's face hit the nearby wall crashing into the cheap plaster.

Dean growled still on the prowl. He picked up Devin's limp body not satisfied with what he's done. "You listen! What you've done to Sam isn't forgettable or forgivable. You're lucky I don't tear out your bodily organs and feed them to the fishes." Dean growled in a harsh whisper.

"If I EVER see you near my family again I won't think twice to put a bullet between your eyes. You understand me?" Dean asked with venom as he held Devin's bleeding head in his hands applying pressure.

"Yeeeesss." Devin wheezed as he tried to wiggle out of Dean's grasp.

"Good." Dean said as he rammed his head once more into the wall effectively knocking him. "Just call that an _effective_ second warning in case you forgot." Dean said smiling as he got up wiping his hands on his jeans.

* * *

Dean looked over to his father and he smiled at the picture. His Dad was running his hands through Sam's long hair as he was staring down at Sam like he was the most important thing. _Which he is. _He's just glad Dad remembered it. It seemed that the fight that just ensued wasn't even given a look over.

He was startled when the door whipped open and a very worried Doctor barged in. Oh right.

"What happened in here!?" Doctor Wallace stated then gasped as he saw the unconscious body lying near the wall obviously knocked out.

"He tried to attack me," Dean shrugged. "Self defense."

"Yeah and defending you did." The Doctor stated as he moved over to the body. "Do you know who he is?" Doctor Wallace asked.

Dean looked over to his father as his father looked back.

Dean looked into the Doctors eyes and in all seriousness answered. "No."

* * *

**EEK Devin finally got his and now he's looking like death warmed over. I'm thinking maybe 2 more chapters left guys it's been a wild and crazy ride. **

***Again I was not trying to make fun of anyone who has bi-polar disorder.* **

**Remember this is fake and I added it to help Devin as a character develop and add appeal to the story. I hope I don't offend anyone. Feedback is appreciated. Thanx Charity**


	17. Chapter 17

**Authors Note: **Phew what a crazy ride this has been. I can't put into words how happy I am with the response I have gotten over this idea. The initial coming about for this particular story was in a dream and the dream went a bit differently then the story but in the same terms nonetheless this is probably the first story I ever thought up. But it's the last one I'm doing at the moment weird lol. But nevertheless after this is done I have another one right after this and I'm pretty sure you'll love it all my dedicated limp Sam fans. We'll just have to wait and see what I concoct next. Shall we? Ok guys I lied this is the last chapter and I hope you've enjoyed this story as much as I have. Thanx for all your support and reviews. Thanx Charity

* * *

After the Doctor brought in a full on medical team to escort Devin out he was bombarded with questions. Why? What? How? When? They were coming at a dizzying pace.

He looked to his Dad for help but John just shrugged not really knowing what to do. Dean figured now was really the best time to channel Sammy and bring out his puppy dog face.

Quickly Dean blinked his eyes rapidly creating air so they would water. Once his eyes watered slightly he looked to the questioning Doctor as he puffed out his bottom lip. "Listen," Dean sighed as he faked a sob. "My brother is sleeping and I just want to spend some time with him ok." He asked innocently knowing that the brother spiel would reel the Doctor in.

Doctor Wallace's face softened as he took in Dean's features. "Ok, I'll ask more questions in the morning." He said softly as he smiled quietly exiting.

Dean smiled a shit eating grin as the Doctor exited. _Well I'll be damned. _I'm a God.

* * *

Sam was aware of two things. One was there were no colors doing a magnificent dance in front of his eyelids. Two someone was gently caressing his skull almost soothing him back into a peaceful sleep. There's only one person he knows who does that. Well does that when no one is looking of course. Dean.

Sam's forehead scrunched up as he pried open his eyelids. Blinking a few times to clear his vision. He wasn't rewarded with Dean's swinging amulet or the smell of his brother's aftershave.

He was rewarded with the smell of gun oil, leather, and sweat. Dad?

"Dad?" Sam asked confusingly as he tried to piece together the puzzles. His Dad never showed affection like that.

"I'm right here Sammy. I'm glad to see you're awake." John said gently as he quickly took his hand away.

"Dean?" Sam questioned next wanting to know where his brother was afraid that maybe something went wrong in that fight.

"I'm over here Sammy." Dean cooed as he slipped his hand into Sam's.

Sam turned his heavy head to see Dean on the other side. What was he a side show?

"Easy Sammy your ok." He heard his brother gently say. He never realized that he was actually starting to hyperventilate. Over what?

He had his Dad and his brother here and nothing could be better. Nothing could be better except a full ride scholarship to Stanford. _Well shit._

He had forgotten about that. Now he knows why Dean is acting so calm. He's waiting for him to talk more now that there Dad is here to hear.

He never should have said anything that night never should have let Devin bully him all these years, never should have said a damn thing today. Never should have opened his damn mouth. It would have been for the better good for everyone.

Sam silently twisted his hands in the sheets as he clenched his jaw. _Never should have been born. _

* * *

Dean furrowed his brow in concern as he watched his sibling start to twist and rip at the sheets. His jaw set at a clench. _His brother was thinking and thinking hard at that. _

He assumes it's about there earlier conversation but he isn't too sure. Sam could be thinking about bunny rabbits for all he knew. He's just a little hurt that Sam wouldn't talk to him about him even though he promised.

He gave Sam a _what the hell _look but Sam only looked pleadingly up at him as he made a desperate eye roll to Dad. Oh god. He forgot about his father even being here. His Dad was never one for affection that was out in the open so now that Sam was awake he was stock quiet just silently observing.

So Sam _did_ have college on the mind and he _did_ want to talk. Just not in front of Dad he got it.

"Uh…Dad?" Dean piped up as he looked at his father.

"Yeah." John answered as he unfolded his arms.

"Could you get me a coffee?" He asked in his most believing tone.

"Sure," John said with a curious shrug. "You want anything Sammy?" John asked his youngest and was dismayed when all he got was a subtle nod for no.

"Ok," He whispered. "I'll be back."

"Thanks." Dean shouted to the closed door.

Dean suddenly changed his attention to Sam as Sam seemed to shrink. "Ok I'm here now. It's just us you can talk." Dean offered.

Sam swallowed as he tried to find out where to begin. Dean said they would continue and he just had to know one thing from Dean before he made any decisions. "Dean are you mad at me?"

"Mad at you?" Dean echoed slightly taken aback. "I could never be mad at you. Surprised. But not mad. I'm proud Sam you'll never know how proud I am."

Proud? Did Dean just say he was proud of him? "So you won't be mad at me if I go?" Sam asked in a small voice.

"No," Dean sighed. "I told you I could never be mad at you." Dean smiled as Sam seemed to relax. _Dad though that's another case._

Sam seemed to get his thought as he looked worriedly at the door. Dean reached over and patted his shoulder. "He'll understand." Dean smiled as Sam just seemed to shake his head in a defiant no.

"No," Sam whispered. "He'll never understand. He never did and he never will."

Dean frowned and went to saw something when the door opened.

"Did I miss something?" John asked juggling his coffee while closing the door.

Sam smiled a strained smile. "Dad I have to tell you something."

* * *

**The End**

**Well that's the end and I hope I don't get pitch forks for leaving it there. I didn't want to dig too deep into the whole fight and stuff. I hope you understand. I had so much fun with this and I am so happy with the response I got. **

**But there is another project in the works any one interested in the summary or as a hint or clue just hit me up I'll be glad to share. As for now peace out. Feedback is appreciated. Thanx Charity**


	18. Chapter 18

Hey guys I decided to take this story and completely revamp it. When I read through it I can tell it needs a lot of work but I'm revamping it over at my LJ and making sure it's truly as best as it can be.

If you want to read the new version go on over to www(dot)cherry916(dot)live journal(dot)com/97536(dot)html

Obviously remove the (dot) with . And you can follow the new story. If you want you can comment anonymously or if you have a LJ comment that way or just comment on here. I would love to here what you guys think of the new and improved version.

Thanx Charity

**EDIT: **I've had a lot of requests to just post the new story on here but I'm having so much trouble trying to since I don't have Microsoft Word but a knockoff of it and it won't let me post long things and writing it all, all over again is just impossible. So you can follow it on live journal if this puts and inconvenience to anyone I'm truly sorry but I tried.

www(dot)cherry916(dot)livejournal(dot)com/97536(dot)html -Remember to go here for the story just remove the (dot) with a .


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